When you first wake up in the morning, what do you do? For some it could be hitting the snooze button, praying, meditating, but for most- it's checking our phones. There are texts to send, emails to write, social media to scroll through, and stories to read. All-day long we're online ingesting news, whether it's political, current events, sports, entertainment, the list goes on.

And with those stories inevitably come the comments. A never-ending abyss that occupies the words of strangers all over the world: both positive and negative. I bet if you looked at ANY post or article online right now and scrolled through the comments, you would without fail, be able to find nasty and aggressive remarks. But when did this become the norm? When did we become so mean?

Here are a few examples of real comments I came across recently on a variety of topics:

1.Miley Cyrus releases new album Plastic Hearts. A comment reads "She has sold her soul to the devil and her mental health status is off the charts."

2.Chef Katie Lee posts a photo holding her 3-month-old daughter Iris captioning it "Wish I could hold her like this forever." A user comments on the photo saying, " I'm sure you've been told this but it's not good to hold Iris so much."

3.On Thanksgiving, People Magazine posted a photo of a doctor in full PPE hugging an elderly patient suffering from COVID-19 serving as a reminder of the human toll and impact of the virus. A woman comments saying "And what are his underlying issues! Stop saying Covid is killing people. It's not! It's the disease they already have! Fear mongering at its finest." Another user comments back and says "go away" to which the woman responds and says "right after you die."

4.Prince Charles and Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall restrict comments on their Twitter account after a flood of abusive comments come on the heels of the Netflix show he Crown. One user wrote: "The world hates you Camilla. Princess Diana forever."

5.Actor Elliot Page, formerly known as Ellen Page, comes out as Transgender in a heartfelt letter. One comment read, "What the actual fuck bro. I used to look up to you."

Where to even begin? While the stories are different, the sentiment in the comments remains the same: Disapproving. Hateful. Judgmental. When did we become so brazen with being SO hateful to complete strangers? We've become entitled in believing that if something is online or public, it's fair game to attack and judge. It's become the norm to share our unsolicited advice/ opinions vs. simply minding our own business. We carry on with no regard for how our words or comments will affect the person on the receiving end. Whatever happened to "If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all?"

This has been a topic that has occupied my mind for months now, I actually started writing this piece right after the first presidential debate. Remember that? What triggered me the most (and there were MANY options to choose from) were the low blows being thrown during a debate that would determine who would be elected the highest seat in our nation. I remember physically cringing when President Donald Trump attacked Vice President Joe Biden's son, Hunter on his past drug addiction. You could see the distress and shock in Joe Biden's face. But before you stop reading because you support Trump, this isn't about that. Whether you're a Republican or Democrat, I believe we can all agree a lack of human decency was shown by using someone's child's very real, raw drug addiction as a pawn in a game to win.

How many Americans watching had a parent, a child, a friend, a loved one who battled the same addiction? How many people watching CURRENTLY were that person struggling with addiction suffering in silence, shame, and embarrassment? I couldn't help but imagine how Jill Biden must've felt sitting front row listening to her son's past addiction attacked on national television for the whole world to watch, something I'm sure that has already broken her heart behind closed doors. Instead of focusing on the real issues our nation was and is facing, a pain point was used to intentionally bruise his opponent. Yet somehow after everything, I was still shocked by the viciousness of it all.

The same thought kept replaying in my head: Where is the empathy? Where is the compassion?

When COVID-19 broke, we were applauding and praising our first responders and doctors for their service on the front lines. Nine months later, we're crucifying and bashing the same people trying to keep us safe. People proudly refuse to wear masks and claim they're oppressed by wearing a fabric over their nose and mouth. They boast how the virus is fake with no shred of sympathy for the thousands of lives claimed who died alone or family members left behind. People are "bored" and "sick of" the pandemic without any regard for what it's like to be a healthcare worker during a pandemic or the negative ripple effect their actions will have. Doctors and nurses don't have that luxury. No matter how "over it" and "sick of" saving the lives of people who have been advised to do better for months, they push forward bravely risking themselves every single day. THANK YOU.

Before you get the urge to comment that COVID-19 is a conspiracy, masks don't work, and bigfoot is real, this piece isn't about that either. It's about shining a light on the hate that spreads even quicker than COVID-19 the second a fact, an opinion, or point of view is expressed that is different than ours. Anthony Fauci, the nation's leading top disease expert who has advised six presidents, has been the main target of hate and online bullying. Most recently being called to be "beheaded" by a former adviser to President Donald Trump, Stephen Bannon. Fauci has now been forced to hire security for himself and his family due to the ongoing death threats he's received. And what deserved this harsh rhetoric? Simply doing his job, reporting on SCIENCE and FACTS to help keep our nation safe from more people being infected and dying. How did we get here? When did this become acceptable behavior?

Suddenly not believing an opposing view is punishable by death (literally) or banishing them with hate. When did we get so comfortable erasing any moral line that signals this has gone way too far? Yes, we are entitled to our own thoughts and opinions, but does that give us free rein to attack anything that doesn't fit within our scope of beliefs? We've seen this vicious cycle happen so many times: A story breaks, the world speculates, takes a side, throws blames, sends love or hate, rinse and repeat. Whether it's an unarmed black man getting shot or a woman of sexual assault coming forward with her story, the cycle remains intact. The news break, sides are formed, and judgment is thrown. "He shouldn't have done that!" "Well, why didn't she come forward sooner?" Immediately the victim-blaming begins. "What was she wearing?" "If only they would have complied, they wouldn't be here!" When did public opinion turn into the modern-day judge and executioner?

Let me be crystal clear, in no way am I saying that everyone is innocent, and crimes are never committed. Rather this is to expose how QUICK people would rather dispute, discredit, or justify a trauma vs. show any kind of human compassion. We sit on moral pedestals throwing rocks at everyone below us for not making the right decisions or being what we deem good enough or smart enough. It's become easier to turn a blind eye or criticize instead of extending an ounce of humanity in trying to understand the other side, regardless of if you agree. We would rather be the loudest in the room, right over everything instead of coming to a common ground of understanding and sympathy.

If only the Founding Fathers wrote a disclaimer when creating our First Amendment right to Freedom of Speech. Warning: do no harm unto others, your words carry weight and consequences. Whenever I see attacking or judgmental comments, I immediately think: Wow, this person clearly has a lot of free time on their hands, why do you care so much, and how is this directly affecting you? Is this to say that I've never been triggered by someone's opinion or said an unkind word? Of course not, I'm human. But I never go out of my way to be intentionally hateful to others and that's what we see so much of on the internet and in the world. If only the words we spewed out into the world were boldly inked onto our bodies as permanent reminders of what kind of person we are, maybe we would think twice before we spoke.

If you think Miley Cyrus has sold her soul to the devil, why do you bother wasting your energy focusing on her? You could easily unfollow her page and not listen to her music instead. If you have the urge to mommy shame someone in saying they hold their baby too much? Please don't. You have NO idea what that woman may have gone through to be able to hold her own child in the first place. Also, no one asked you. Wish someone to death because they simply told you to go away? Go seek psychiatric help, you're clearly in deep pain. Feel the need to comment on someone else's relationship because it's plastered on the news and Netflix? No matter how much you think you know, in the end: it is not your relationship, nor is it your business. Also, imagine how YOU would feel if someone told you the whole world hates you. And lastly, if you no longer look up to an actor because they were brave enough to live in their truth, then you clearly weren't THAT true of a fan in the end if your admiration only extends to them living by YOUR standards.

Instead of being quick to criticize, we should work overtime to empathize, have compassion, and be kinder. Recognize that every person, whether you like them or not, is a human being with feelings and not immune to feeling hurt, no matter how much you think they deserve it. And remember that the world could use a lot more LUV: listening, understanding, and validation. It takes no effort at all to lift someone up, say a kind word and be a decent human being. Before you speak, think: is this going to hurt or help someone? Will this make or break their day? Would I want these same words said to me, to my family, to my loved ones? In a year when we've already lost so much, we must fight to not lose our ability to show compassion and extend a hand vs. hate.