What You See When You Look In The Mirror

What You See When You Look In The Mirror

Most days its not easy to love yourself.
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When you look in the mirror, what do you see about yourself that you don’t like or want to change? Your nose? Your mouth? Your freckles? Well what about when you look in the mirror and hate everything you see? At that point in time, how much do you wish you were someone else?

Hating everything about yourself makes life difficult. The little demons inside you make it impossible to get anything done. Those annoying little voices who tell you that you aren’t smart enough, or pretty enough, or tough enough or simply enough. It gets to a point where it’s too much and you just can’t take it anymore. This is the voice that you have given all your power for the longest time. This is the voice that you have to realize is not in control anymore. You are in control, and you need to understand that you are worth it.

It’s very difficult when you haven’t ever seen any good in your reflection and there is something new to find every day and hate. The days always seem longer and as the day gets slower the thoughts get meaner and more aggressive. I don’t remember a time where I have looked in the mirror and liked what I have seen. Almost every day when I look in the mirror, I have something negative to say about myself. But there are days where I look at myself and say, “Maybe I don’t look so bad today,” but then there is something that comes from out of nowhere and tries to suppress the good thoughts and make the negative thoughts the loudest until there is no more ignoring them.

Even though there are thoughts that can counteract and rationalize the nasty ones, they always seem to get pushed to the side and the bad ones shine through. These thoughts don’t help the image you see in the mirror because by this point there are so many evil comments thrown at you, you can’t help but see them physically manifest in the form of the person looking back at you.

However, some days are better than others, and that’s when you know you are making progress. There are days where you don’t even need to look in the mirror and you feel like you own the world. But those days don’t last too long and sometimes, they’re not even days at all. Sometimes they are fleeting moments when you think you can make it out of the dark void but then it just sucks you right back in. But there is hope. Take some time to think about the good traits that you have, because when you like yourself, your reflection will too.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.theodysseyonline.com/maryland/open-letter-to-my-mirror/391600

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Every Girl Who’s Ever Tried On Jeans Knows Thick Calves Are Just Problematic As Thick Thighs

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I understand the issues with thick thighs. Your pants split at the seams, wear down between the thighs due to rubbing, and when summertime comes, the chafing can be so bad it can result in rashes (life hack: spray deodorant works great to prevent this!). Not to mention the struggle of finding shorts that don't cut off the circulation to the rest of your legs. I don't have the thickest of thighs, but I'd say that in proportion to the rest of my body, they're a decent size.

The issue I want to talk about, though, is thick calves. As a girl, I would argue this is an even bigger problem than thick thighs, at least at times. Don't agree? Let me shed some light on my situation.

One of the biggest issues that come to mind when I think about my thick calves is finding jeans (or pants in general) that fit properly. I hate jeans, I think they're very uncomfortable, and I've realized that my body proportions play a big role in this opinion. I prefer skinny jeans to any other style and I wear a size 5, which is the same size both of my older sisters wear.

If you know all three of us, you know that we have similarities in our body types, but we also have very different bodies. My oldest sister is shorter than me but has wider hips than I do. My middle sister is taller than me and has wider hips than I do. It doesn't make sense that I would wear the same size, does it?

This could have to do with the sizing system of women's clothing, which is a whole other article I could write, but it largely comes down to this: If the pants don't fit past my calves, I cannot wear them. Period. If I force it, they end up being the most uncomfortable things ever, not allowing me to even bend my knees due to the tightness of the fabric on my legs. Taking off jeans that are too small means you pretty much have to turn them inside out to do it, which gets frustrating.

So the simple solution is to just go up a size. The issue I then might face is finding pants that fit over my calves comfortably, but then are too loose around the waist because I don't have very wide hips. The simple solution then? Wear leggings and sweatpants in colder weather and skirts or dresses in warmer weather...

I have four years of marching band to thank for the thickness of my calves. Not to mention my adoration of high heels (I wore them a lot in high school, alright?) But when all is said and done, I would much rather have my toned legs than thin, potentially fragile legs (not that there's anything wrong with that either, bodies are built differently and I fully understand that!). I don't have a very feminine body to begin with (narrow hips, small chest, minimal curves), so it's actually really great to have nice legs because then I have something to feel good about.

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