I’m a single 18-year-old, and I’m annoyed.
I’m not annoyed about being single. (Well, maybe I do get easily annoyed when I see couples doing couple-y stuff and being disgustingly adorable…)
But I’m annoyed with how we as females have allowed guys to simply check out of romance and treat us like we aren’t treasures.
I’m exhausted with the “Netflix and chill” invites and the non-date hangouts. I’m tired of guys just “talking” to me. I want something real and I think a lot of us do too.
Yes, it’s normal to let a little jealousy turn into bitterness the longer you are single, but what hurts my heart more is seeing girls like my best friends get their hearts broken by guys who never deserved their hearts in the first place. It saddens me that a lot of us allow guys to not open our doors and to not bring us flowers and to only give us their time whenever it's most convenient for them.
What happened to romance?
I want a guy who’s actually going to ask me onto a real date. I want a guy who’s going to bring me flowers every once in a while because he wants to. I want a guy who’s going to just hold me because he missed me all day. I want something real.
I’m done with the “talking” phases with guys. I want a guy who isn’t afraid to tell me how he feels, not just when he’s drunk. I want a guy who’s going to make time to see me, even if it’s just for five minutes. I want a guy who isn’t trying to play games and only graces me with a text or two because he’s “so busy.” I want a guy who isn’t trying to just sleep with me. I want a guy who values the person I am and who knows my favorite color. I want a guy to know my favorite Blackhawks players and my guilty pleasure binge show on Netflix when I’m sick. I want him to know what really matters to me and what makes me happy. I want someone who works hard for his dreams while supporting me as I work towards mine. I want a guy to be my best friend and the keeper of my heart. I want a guy who’s going to hold my hand, even if it's clammy (it happens, sorry). I want a guy who will laugh with me and loves being silly. I want a guy who won't let me doubt the way he feels about me. I want someone who sees life as one big adventure and who isn’t afraid of gaining new experiences. I want someone who helps me grow as a person. I want someone who will truly love me, while allowing me to love him in return. I want a guy who will pursue God with me every day and who’s going to let me drag his butt to church. I want a guy whose face will light up whenever he sees me.
I want romance. I want the real thing.
Nowadays, we’re all settling for less than we deserve. But please, wait.
Wait for the guy who’s going to make you feel like you’re the only girl in the world. Wait for the guy who’s going to buy you flowers and hold your hand. Wait for the guy who’s going to be there through the good and the bad. Wait for the guy who really does deserve your time and your heart. Wait for the guy who makes you believe in love. Wait for this guy, because he’s out there. Wait for him because you deserve a pure, wonderful, exhilarating, butterfly-inducing, happy, healthy love. You deserve someone who’s going to love you for the person you are, not just your body. You deserve someone who will respect you, nurture you, and value you. You deserve that guy who may just be the “nice” guy. That guy is out there.
He’s out there, waiting to meet you too. But until you meet, don’t waste your emotions on a love that isn’t what you deserve. Don’t give your heart away to just anyone. Being single is rough and frustrating and in some moments, it can be lonely. But no matter what society tells you, you deserve a love that pursues you and a love that is real. That's worth waiting for, no matter how long it takes for life to lead you to one another.
Please, wait for him. He may come tomorrow, or a week from now, or maybe a year from now.
If you're single right now, maybe it's time to be growing in the relationship with yourself first, because that’s the one that’s always going to be around. You have to love yourself before you can ever truly love someone else. And maybe while you’re waiting for Mr. Right, being on your own will lead you to the you that you’ll be when you finally meet him. Focus on your goals, and health, and wishes. But always remember your worth, because you’re worth more than a “Netflix and chill” text. You deserve honest and true joy. Please wait for him.
If you're in a relationship right now, I hope that guy treats you the way you deserve to be treated. I hope you're incandescently happy where just the thought of him brings you happiness. I hope you feel loved and respected. And I hope he values you with every ounce of his heart because you deserve that.
So here I am, 18 and single. But I'm happy. I'm in college, working for my future. I'm making new memories. I have wonderful and loving friends. I have everything I need. It's difficult sometimes, but when I finally meet the right guy, all of this heartbreak and those moments I doubted myself for being single in the first place will disappear. Because I'll know that I waited for the right guy, the man whom God made especially for me. Because I waited for the relationship and love story I deserved. I hope you all feel that way too.
Remember to never settle for less than you deserve.
All my love, always.
