8 Things Not To Do After He Says "It's Over"
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8 Things Not To Do After He Says "It's Over"

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8 Things Not To Do After He Says "It's Over"

It's happening again. You put yourself out there, you fell for the guy, and now you're sitting in his truck while he's saying stuff like "I know I'm being selfish," and "I just don't want to hurt you anymore," and, my personal favorite, "I'm really going to miss you." What's a girl supposed to do? Most of the time, we just sit there not knowing how to react. We either start crying profusely or get ridiculously angry, or both (both is fun), but mostly, we just think "Now what?" It's the end of yet another sad love story, and different people handle breakup survival in different ways, but really, here's what you shouldn't do right after he says "it's over":

1. Don't pretend to be okay

You're hurting, and it's crazy to think that, unless you're some kind of cold-hearted siren or unless you didn't really like him that much, you aren't going to be in a little bit of pain for a while. It sucks to be broken up with. It's rejection at its finest form, and it takes time to accept what has happened. Take a few days to recuperate. If that means shoving your face into a pint of Ben & Jerry's, do it. You have the freedom to take time to find your cool again.

2. Don't go out that night

We all have those friends who say "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. He's dumb. Let's go out and get drunk tonight, it will make you feel better." WRONG. Wrong wrong wrong. Alcohol is a depressant, so after you've downed three doubles and are staring at your phone while your buzz kicks in, you're going to want to call him and either A. beg for him back or B. yell at him until you start crying again.

You could also be that girl who drunkenly flirts and dances all over everything with a penis right after a breakup just to fill the rejection bullet hole you've just experienced. Don't be that girl. You might do something you'll regret. Which leads me to...

3. Don't get a Tinder right away

I know it seems like the best way to get over a breakup is to find someone new, but I can tell you from personal experience that that is not always the best route. Chances are, you are not ready to jump into bed, let alone into a relationship, with another guy for a while. You need to take the time to sort your wits, don't be the serial rebound girl. Tinder is fun once it has been a few weeks, and you've had time to be emotional. Don't do it because you're alone and needy, do it because you're confident and you're ready to move on.

4. Don't wait to get your things

Speaking of moving on, let's also move out. You shouldn't wait to get your stuff from his place. It's just prolonging the inevitable moment when you will have to see him again and go through the emotional roller coaster that is exchanging and dividing your things. Do it all in one swoop; that way, although you might be in some serious emotional pain after it's all over, you won't have to relive everything after you have somewhat gotten over it. It's like picking a scab after a few days. Yes, keep that mental image because that's how horrible it will be.

5. Don't be friends

I know it's hard because "you were so close" and "he knows you so well" but you can't be friends, at least not right away. Getting over the death of your romantic relationship with him is going to take some grieving time. If you try to be friends right away, it's just going to cause a lot of confusion and backpedaling. Give yourself the chance to find some closure and move on before you try to repair the friendship. Once it's been a while and you know you won't feel like ripping your heart out of your chest every time you see him, then you can consider getting coffee.

6. Don't waste your time pouting

As much as we all want to stay in bed and wait for him to call and ask for you back, chances are, it's not going to happen, and you will have wasted prime closure time. The first step is doing something that makes you feel good. Have a girl's night, go to the gym, buy a new book, get your nails done; just do something that focuses on you. Try to make the most of this time, it's your turn to be selfish. You will be thankful later.

7. Don't convince yourself you are going to be alone forever

Chances are, you feel like the least wanted person on the planet at this moment, and you figure you're destined to be a lonely old maid for the rest of your life. Here's the thing: no matter how old you are, there is always the possibility of finding love. You will not end up alone, and this is not the end of the world. Acknowledge that this guy didn't work out for a reason and you'll find someone worthy of your charm in the future. Life isn't over, so don't let yourself give up on love.

What you 100 percent should do is...

8. Take a deep breath

It's over, so there is no point in dwelling on it forever. You are smart, you are capable, and you have the strength to get past this little speed bump in the road of life. The future is so much brighter than you think right now. So cry because it's over and smile because it happened. Learn from this experience, take a deep breath, and keep going.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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