There are so many things I wish I could tell you, but I know I will never get the chance. Even if I did get the chance there would be no point because you and I both know you would not care. After all this time I still love you and I miss you so much it hurts. I miss laughing at stuff that no one else would think is funny but you. I miss how you would always make me watch your dumb shows. I miss how I could tell you anything and I knew without a doubt that my secret was safe with you. But above that I miss the way you made me feel… you would make me feel like I mattered in the world. When I was in your arms it was like it was just you and I.

I don't regret the relationship by any means, because through these 2 years I learned what it was like to love someone but more than that I knew what it was like to be loved by someone. I know that from the outside no one would understand our relationship, but words cannot even describe how you even made me feel. I loved how the two of us could roast each other, but through the words we said we both knew how we really felt. Our relationship was full of laughs, jokes, and acting completely crazy.

I wish you would know how much you broke me. I would choose you over anyone, and I would choose us over anything, but when you had to make the choice you would never choose me. I feel disposable to you, like losing me meant nothing to you. You completely broke me in so many different ways. I am scared to trust anyone again, because the thought of being hurt scares me so much. I never want to feel the way I felt again or I guess in a way I still feel, because there is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. I know that there is no point holding on to something that cannot work it just doesn't make it any easier. I don't know if you have moved on I just know it would not change anything.

Despite all of that, I just want the best for you, I know how I still feel and so I just hope you are happy. I hope you find the person you are supposed to be with, and I hope she makes you as happy as you made me. I want you to know that you deserve the world!