Part of the educational aspect of going to college is learning how to coexist in the same tight quarters as someone who has a different sleep schedule, different tastes in music, a different social life. No matter how well you get along with a roommate, there is something lost in not being able to claim a room as completely your own.
I grew up sharing a bedroom with my older sister during the most informative and developmental years of my life, and I wouldn’t change the whispered conversations after the lights had been turned off or fights over keeping personal belongings “on your own side” for anything. As much as I cherish the charm of co-existence, I would be lying if I said the first time I shut the door of my room in my new apartment I did not breathe a deep, resonating sigh of relief. For the first time in almost two years, I was the proud owner of a space which I could call mine.
The peaceful and centering sensation of taking charge of my room reminded me of buying school supplies for the first days of elementary school; in a gleeful, borderline-embarrassing way, I was outfitting myself for a successful future that hinged on choosing the right color folder or correctly-textured throw pillow.
While these decisions seemed trivial on the surface, they represented a deeper commitment and opportunity for furthering myself in a way that depended solely on my personal choices.
Do not take for granted the bliss of getting to choose alone time. Shut your door. Cover the walls in your art and your pictures. Fill the closet with your clothes and kick off your shoes at the door. Revel in the ownership of a space that is beholden only to you. This is where you recharge, lighting a candle or drinking cup of tea or falling asleep after a long day of being a semi-functional person.
This is where you work, studying for tests, researching the law school you maybe want to go to cross-legged in bed, scheduling and planning the world outside the walls of your sanctuary. This is where you play, reading your favorite books, watching movies and TV shows in your underwear, laughing, talking and snuggling with those closest to you.
Most of all, this is where you rediscover what it means to be solitary, embracing possession of space and self with intent and openness. Whether your room reflects your personality in decorations or lack thereof, there is an intimacy and a character in having four walls whose purposes are solely to hold and protect you.
