Last week, I came across a meme on Tumblr of Carrie Bradshaw quoting a line from Sex and The City where she said “I revealed too much too soon. I was emotionally slutty.” As soon as I read it, I really started thinking about how I've acted with boys I've dated (or almost dated). Have I been emotionally slutty? Is being emotionally slutty a good thing or a bad thing? Should I even be concerned about being emotionally slutty at all? These were the kinds of questions this meme had me thinking about at 11 o’clock on a Tuesday night.

Let me just inform you of the fact that I have seen every single episode of Sex And The City, plus both movies. This show is iconic and is filled with little gems like the quote I mentioned above, but I guess I’d forgotten about this one despite its prominence and significance in my sad excuse of a “love life”. I had never given any thought about the concept of “emotional sluttiness” before this week, but it’s quite a cheeky little term and anyone is able to fall victim to it. You may have been emotionally slutty when you brought up your previous S/O on a first date, or when you described your cat’s life story to someone you just started chatting up on Tinder the week before. I guess when it comes to this kind of thing, there are no boundaries to what is or isn’t considered TMI.

After a bit of contemplation on my part, I realized that I have definitely, in fact, been emotionally slutty. After getting comfortable with someone after a mere week of conversation, my insecurities began to rear their ugly little heads, as well as my history with mental illness. While telling someone about your mental illness may not be a big deal to you if you’re comfortable sharing that information, it may make the person you’re sharing it with feel a certain type of way. For example: they may begin to pity you, or reassure you in the vaguest way possible because they have no idea what you’ve been through, or they might just go ghost on you. Sometimes, they’ll do all three of these things and there isn’t anything you can do about it.

I don’t regret speaking about my anxiety and depression because dealing with my mental illness(es) have shaped me into the person I am today, but I do regret letting my insecurities and fears of the future spill over into just about every potential relationship I’ve ever had. That just might be the reason why I haven’t been on a proper date in months, but that’s an entirely different ball game. Regardless, while these factors may classify as a bit more emotionally slutty than others, I guess it depends on the person you’re confiding in. One person might be happy that you feel comfortable with them, but another may get freaked out and bail on you. The bottom line is, anyone can be emotionally slutty, but it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. For the ones who’ve bailed; it’s your loss. For the ones like me who are reading this piece right now, however, hang in there; there is bound to be someone out there who appreciates our emotional sluttiness. In the meantime, we can all be alone together.