Lately, I have been trying to work on my happiness. It was not something that always came easy to me. I struggle with depression, I have experienced the lowest points in my depression and lately I have days where I forget it is a part of me. I will most likely struggle with it in some way for the rest of my life. It was hard for me to come to that conclusion because I did not want to be like this, I just wanted to be "happy." Everyone always talks about how happy they are, how everyone should "just be happy," which made me think: What does that even mean? What even is 'happiness.' I have felt happy but did this mean I was happy? I wanted to see what other people thought of this abstract word, and possibly even an abstract feeling. So I asked: "What does happiness mean to you?" This is what I gathered:
To some people it involves food...
"Crunchy Cheetos."
-Ryan, 21
"Opening the fridge and seeing a slice of pizza."
- Amanda, 20
"Cinnamon bun Oreos."
-Alyssa, 19
To some it means family...
"Time to enjoy my grandbabies."
-Tim, 53
"Harmony within family."
-Tracy, 54
"Family, without a doubt. My children, their spouses, all my grandchildren. I love when they are around. I'm so happy when everyone is together."
-Terry, 79
"Laughing, sitting around, and enjoying everyone's company."
-Robbie, 12
"Being with my kids!"
- Mary Ann, 51
"I have a great family...[they are all] the absolute best! Time with them creating memories is happiness."
-John, 53
"Family time. It's precious and rare right now."
-Clare, 47
"My kids being happy :)"
-Jayne-Anne, 50
To some it means animals...
"And of course my dogs and cats!"
-Jayne-Anne, 50
"Surrounding yourself with kittens and puppies."
-Emily, 22
"Cats."
-Alyssa, 19
To some it is self-acceptance...
"Happiness means being yourself."
-Arianna, 21
"Accomplishing what I want to do in the company of good people, in a comfortable environment with good vibes all around."
-Scott, 20
"Being content with myself and my life."
-Nicole, 37
"Being accepted for who you are."
-Mark, 22
"Surrounding yourself with family and friends that love you. As well as loving yourself."
-Matt, 23
To some happiness is pretty simplistic...
"It probably means like 'I'm so happy!' and you jump up in the air and stuff."
-Stella, 6
"Happiness is when your best friend opens a bottle of wine for you."
-Francesca, 21
"Right now, it is seeing Donald Trump lose the election."
-Sarah, 19
"Anyone you love that makes you smile and happy inside!"
-Reese, 13
"Music."
-Dylan, 25
"Friendship."
-Maria, 8
" Traveling. Specifically being in Turkey is when I'm happy."
-Melise, 20
To some it's a little more complex...
"Happiness is contentment. It is looking around you and coming to the conclusion that your life is enough. That no amount of money will change you. No people are more important than the ones you surround yourself with. No unattainable dreams. Just looking at your life and thinking, 'There is nothing more that I want or need'."
-Halle, 19
"Happiness is that feeling you get when it's 4:43 a.m., and you're in the hospital, covered in wires, surrounded by beeping machines and flashing indicators of alive-ness, doctors rushing in and out, deep lung suction, painful endless hacking, and you've yet to get a wink of sleep tonight, because death feels imminent and you can't quite wrap your head around not existing, which is fucking scary, scarier than anything you've ever felt before, and you can't stop coughing, as the phlegm floods your lungs, but in the middle of all this chaos, you realize that life has been quite an extraordinary ride, full of love and laughter and adventure, and that even now, here, in what could very well be the end, you are surrounded by friends and family, and that no matter what happens, the "end" will be infused with authentic humor, in one way or another, because you've worked hard to ensure that it would be that way, and no one one will weep, but rather, jokes will be told, and people will smile and say, 'Yup, life is tough, but it's also beautiful.' That is happiness to me."
-Shane, 23
"At my age, I'm happy that I found a place that finally works. [The nursing home] may not be ideal, but I'm here with my wife and close to my children. I get to see my son, his wife, and their three beautiful girls. My daughter, she's a smart women with a PhD, spends nine months working in Japan and three months doing pottery around here. Her and her son travel so much and it makes me happy they are experiencing the world. My oldest son is so good to me. He and his wife visit me often and help my wife and I set up the rest of our money to help different charities. That makes me happy too, being able to give to others without benefit to me, just purely giving."
-George, 93
Happiness is not a defined, concrete thing. We cannot hold happiness, we cannot see happiness, we cannot smell, hear, or taste happiness, but we can feel it. We can work on ourselves and our lifestyles to improve our mental state, we can exercise to give us endorphins, we can take medication if we are really struggling. But what it really comes down to is that you have something that you hold close to your heart that can make a smile slip across your face at any given moment.
What is happiness to me? Surviving. Fighting. Knowing that you have come this far and you will continue for a long time. Not caring what others think of you. Laughing really hard over something that is not even that funny. Your roommate bringing you a cup of tea when you're having a bad day. Sitting on the beach and listening to your favorite song or reading a really good book. Traveling to new places and seeing how amazing this world is and knowing that there is still so much to see. It is warm sunshine on your face, and creating sunshine when there is none. Happiness is a wide variety of things to me. Sometimes I feel it, and sometimes I do not and I now finally know: that's OK.
