It is the scariest, and the never ending question. Whether it is me asking myself, my parents asking, my friends, or people in passing; it is the question that always comes up. It is never any annoyance for me to answer because I totally get it. I love to know about people’s lives, and in some regards that may be what starts the conversation with someone new. It has happened even more when I graduated. People want to know what comes next, what will you be doing, will you be here or moving? My answers usually stay the same, but the never-ending one is “I don’t really know, I guess we will see what God has planned.” This is no getaway from the conversation answer; it is what I truly believe.
Of course, the most pressure to answer this question is from me. I want to know that I am doing what I am meant to do, and that is a whole lot of pressure. So many times I find myself jumping into what is next, instead of just living in what is now. It is something I have dealt with since I was a little girl, wanting to know what activity was coming next as if coloring was not easy or fun enough. Lately, I have been better about just being with my friends in the moment and enjoying the many blessings God has brought into my life. It is a good feeling. However, it is an overwhelming feeling to think I need to figure out how to be an “adult.” I put quotes around that because who truly knows what being an adult is. I know so many adults who still have a childlike nature, but pay bills and do taxes. Adult is just a word to describe another part of our life. It is a lot more responsibility, but a lot of times people just see it as an age, but it is truly up to us when we start “adulting” as we call it.
I would love to know what I am doing next, but I know it is not up to me. It is up to Him. Realizing that is probably the biggest challenge, but yet the biggest comforter there is. He has the plan made up for me, I just have to live every day in His Word and His glory. That is much easier said than done, but to acknowledge it is already a good step.
For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.
No matter what I do, I am made to glorify Him. This can be in my friendships, relationships, job, whatever it may be, I have to do it for Him. That is why my answer has recently been to the question, “what comes next?”…I say, “I don’t know..” but I add….”it is up to what God has in store for me.” If I am not doing things with Him in mind and for His glory, then whatever I am doing is not right and not my true vocation.
This can even be with being single. What comes next does not have to just be a job, it can be a “so dating anyone…?” For the record, no I am not. Is that okay? Absolutely. It is not my time to date anyone. God has other plans for me right now. I am in the state of being single to do whatever He needs me to do. Being in a relationship is one of the best feelings, I know this. I have friends right now who are in such amazing stages of their relationships, and I love it. I love hearing about it, I love being around them (because, yes I third wheel often), and I love being a witness to who God brings together. Don’t get me wrong, there are days where I would love to have someone to lean on, someone to do things with, and to be there for me, and vice versa. That is human nature; however, I know settling is NEVER an option. That word honestly scares me. Never settle. Know that if you are with someone, you are in a season of your life that God has brought you to with someone He brought for you. If you are like me and are single, that is great too. Give your time and yourself to Him, like you would do any boyfriend and let Him bring you the perfect person. He knows -- you don’t.
What comes next? I don’t know. I would love to know. I would love to know what my job will be, who I will marry, along with the multiple other never ending questions. It is all up in the air and something I cannot predict. Right now, what comes next is whatever is supposed to. Every night I pray to God to lead me down whatever path I am supposed to. That is what comes next; whatever steps that path entails. And while doing so, I pray for patience, for guidance, and for love from Him because He will provide so much more than I can imagine.
