“Have you become someone you’re proud of?” my professor asked the class. As everyone sat there contemplating their lives and decisions up until that point, I decided, no, I’m not, but I am on my way to becoming someone I am proud of. There is always room for self-improvement whether it is something as small as wanting to be more focused on school, or as large as wanting to control anger issues. No one is perfect and we can spend our whole lives trying to be, or we can spend our lives knowing we have flaws, doing our best to overcome them and ultimately being someone that we can be proud of.
These are a few steps you can take to begin finding yourself and becoming a better you:
1. Dream Big
What do you want out of life? What do you strive to do? What do you want to achieve? Everyone has dreams and no matter how big or small they can be accomplished if you set your mind to it. Try making a list of all your goals, then start by accomplishing the smallest ones first. By accomplishing small goals first, it will give you the confidence you need to tackle the bigger ones later on.
2. Follow Your Heart
Ever feel like something’s just not right? Ever feel really drawn to someone or something? Maybe your heart is trying to tell you something. Trust in whatever you feel, regardless of the situation or the person. Sometimes when your brain doesn’t know what you need, your heart does, so follow it.
3. Listen more than you talk
We all LOVE to hear ourselves talk, but what we fail to realize is that sometimes what others are saying to us could be really valuable information. Our friends and family are the people closest to us, they are also the ones who can tell us things like, “You are always on your cell phone” or “You get mad at the dumbest things.” Sometimes we need to hear statements like that, take them into consideration and make a change. Listen when people speak, and do not be offended by what they have to say to you, it can only help you to better yourself.
4. Be Spontaneous
It is common for people to fall into routines, and hey, there’s nothing wrong with that expect when it starts to impact your life. Routines are a great way to do things like stay organized, or get the right amount of sleep every night, but they also put a damper on our creativity. Being spontaneous allows us to get out of our comfort zones, experience new things, and sparks creativity.
5. Be Hopeful, Not Fearful
As Roosevelt once said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself,” and he could not be more correct. Fear stands for "False Evidence Appearing Real," and is created by us. We all have the power to decide we are no longer afraid of something, and this can play a big role in bettering yourself. Stop spending time thinking about everything that could go wrong, and start thinking about everything that could go right! By thinking more positively, you will begin to feel less anxious and more hopeful.
6. Be a Peacekeeper
Remember that fight you and your best friend had last week about her “borrowing” your favorite pair of shoes? Well, that was unnecessary. We live in a world where everyone thinks something is owed to them, and it's not. Everyone thinks their opinion is the right one, or that they are not in the wrong, which is also not true. This is what sparks a lot of fights between families, friends, and couples. Next time you find yourself in a heated situation, try to talk in a low, calm tone of voice, do not cut off the other person until they are done saying what they need to, listen to what they say, acknowledge what was said and continue with your next sentence. When people feel like they are being heard in an argument, they will slowly become more calm, and if you are not arguing back then it will slowly turn into a conversation instead of an argument. This leads to better relationships with those around you.
7. Live in the Moment
We live in a society where everything has to be accomplished as fast as humanly possible, but do you ever stop to smell the roses? If not, you should consider taking time out of your day to enjoy all the things life has to offer at a much slower pace. Walk to work in the morning noticing how many clouds there are or how pretty the trees look in the fall. Doing things like that will improve your mood and teach you to appreciate the little things people do for you, and what you can do to give back.
8. Be Forgiving
Everyone makes mistakes, some worse than others, but when people learn from them it is more than okay to forgive them. It may take time, but it will be worth it. Also, learn to forgive yourself for past, and present mistakes. By forgiving yourself, you are learning self-love. This will also cause you to be less stressed overall by realizing you made a mistake, but learning from it and moving on.
9. Be Healthy
How are you supposed to better yourself if you can’t even take care of yourself? By eating right and exercising, you will not only feel better, but go about your day in a brighter mood. Eating right gives you energy to accomplish all you want to. Exercising decreases stress and leaves you feeling clear-minded. Feeling like this makes it a lot easier to work on bettering yourself, because you will have more patience for yourself and everyone around you.
10. BYBS (Be Your Best Self)
As I’ve said, nobody is perfect and we shouldn't strive to be. All we should want to become is someone we are proud of and that varies from individual to individual since everyone wants something different out of life. Regardless of what you want to improve on, always try to be your best self. By doing this, you will slowly fall into good habits and out of bad ones.
