Let's face it, we Hispanic women are in a league all our own. We are loud, feisty, energetic, brutally honest and just plain crazy. Hispanics, in general, are unique, but we women just stand out.
Don't believe me? Here are 18 reasons why it is impossible to forget a Hispanic woman.
1. No, we aren't arguing. That's just how we talk.
Again, Hispanics, in general, are loud but we women take it to a whole new level. When we get together with our cousins, tias or other girls, you are bound to hear us from miles away. To an outsider, it sounds like we are constantly arguing. In reality, we are more than likely gossiping and getting REALLY into the chisme.
2. Speaking of gossip, we are the MVPs.
The FBI should really consider hiring our aunts as private investigators. Normally, gossip is "oh, did you see who so and so is dating now?" and that is it. With Hispanic aunts, they find out who is sleeping with who, when they started sleeping together, where they met, who the previous lovers were of both people, how everyone feels about the situation and so on. Heck, they'd figure out your social security numbers if you'd let them.
3. Sandals are not just for wearing.
Every Hispanic child everywhere knows that when mom gets the chancleta, they better run. Even if mom never used her sandal to physically hit us, the threat was enough to get us to stop.
4. We wear our emotions on our face.
We have the worst poker faces known to man. When a Hispanic woman is pissed, you will know. There is no keeping in what we are feeling and then talking about it later. We will not hesitate to check someone really quick if they get out of line.
5. Just beware the wrath of an angry Hispanic woman in general.
We have the worst tempers of anyone you will ever meet. Seeing an angry Hispanic woman is pretty close to seeing the Hulk in person. Only we don't turn green - we turn beet red. You haven't heard loud until you've heard an angry Hispanic woman speak. Just do yourself a favor, walk away slowly and leave us be when we are angry. And DO NOT tell us to calm down.
6. We use our entire body to talk.
Ever seen us have a conversation? You will notice our entire body moves to the words we are saying. The hands and feet go flying as if we are painting you a visual of what we are saying. And the more heated the conversation, the bigger our movements. We define being expressive when we talk. You will definitely feel like you were there when we talk about a situation.
7. We are pretty much all doctors... or so we think.
Who needs medical professionals when you have Hispanic women? We know all the "fool-proof" ways of getting rid of any and all sicknesses and diseases. From the craziest natural medicines to plowing us with food until we feel better, Hispanic women have a cure for it all. We also have our own sayings that "help" fix illnesses. You will constantly hear us saying "Sana, sana, colito de rana. Si no sana hoy, sanaràs mañana," which literally translates to "heal, heal, little frog tail. If you don't heal today, you will heal tomorrow."
8. And our go-to remedy is Vicks VapoRub.
Hispanic women everywhere swear Vicks VapoRub is a cure-all. Sick with the flu? Have a headache? Ruptured your spleen? Hispanic women will all say the same thing: Put some Vicks on it! I swear Vicks should pay all Hispanic women for the advertising we do. We practically keep them in business!
9. You WILL be fed multiple times a day.
It is impossible to go to a Hispanic house and not be fed. Whether you have known us for years or we just met five minutes ago, we will feed you. We do not even ask if you are hungry; we just make you a plate of whatever meal we are having and give it to you. None of this "I just ate" nonsense.
10. We cook for armies.
When we cook you would think we were cooking for an army of 100 people. We make sure we have PLENTY of food to make sure everyone leaves feeling a thousand pounds heavier.
11. We throw down in the kitchen.
Hispanic women have recipes of a variety of food that they pass down from generation to generation. (And the food is always on point.) When we cook you better believe it'll be bursting with flavor. Whether it is chicken, tacos, rice, empanadas or soup, we don't shy away from seasoning. And the seasoning of choice you will find in any Hispanic kitchen? Goya Adobo!
12. We are brutally honest.
We do not beat around the bush when we feel something. If we do not like you then you will know. (Refer to number four). We do not censor our words around anyone. Maybe we should, but we don't. It is just the way it is. You will know how we feel even if you didn't ask. And our words always hit below the belt when we are really pissed about something/at someone.
13. DO NOT mess with our novelas.
When our novelas (Spanish soap operas) are on, it is best if you just walk away slowly. Every Hispanic woman everywhere can admit they've seen at least one novela in her life. Yes, we know the acting is overly dramatic and someone is either doing drugs, shooting or cheating on their spouse, but it is addictive television.
14. Family is everything.
Whether we are at each other's throats or all lovey dovey, family is everything to us. We can yell and scream at each other, but no outsider better even think about yelling at our family members when we are around.
15. And we take them everywhere too.
We travel in packs. Whether it is on vacation, to another house or even to the grocery store, we take our families with us everywhere we go.
16. We know how to party.
We don't go to parties. We are the party. Once the salsa, bachata or merengue starts blasting, the music takes over. We will dance until early the next morning. (Which is usually when Hispanic parties end.) We also keep the drinks flowing and the food coming. Of course, selfies with our girls are also a MUST.
17. We are loyal as all hell.
We have a certain circle of friends and family that we consider our ride-or-die group. We would do anything for this group of people. These people mean the world to us, and we protect them with everything we have.
18. Strength and determination define us.
Many Hispanic women have been through so much. Whether it is being the sole provider for their kids, balancing work and family, health, legal issues or relationship troubles Hispanics have seen it all. These troubles just fuel us to work harder. We have a determination and strength that drives us.
19. We perfected crazy.
Nobody does crazy quite like us. One thing you have to know about Hispanic women? We are feisty. We can go from zero to 100 and then back to 0 quicker than any race car. We are loud. We have a temper. We are a passionate breed of women. It is just who we are and there is no changing that. Our words sting and our looks sting even worse.
We Hispanic women are one of a kind and nearly impossible to forget once you meet us. These were just some of our many qualities that stand out. We speak a mix of English and