Is 'the one' just a fairy-tale concept? Maybe — it depends on how you look at it. People generally picture love at first sight when people think of 'the one,' fantasizing about a relationship like a puzzle that magically fits together. When I think of the one, however, I picture Ruth and Boaz and consider the man God has set aside for me, realizing I must wait patiently for him and stay by his side through life's most difficult circumstances.
We realize how important love is at a young age. Many of my friends began dating all the way back in middle school and fantasized about their crushes, drawing hearts, X's and O's on their notebook and scrawling their signature in colorful ink. Dating became even more important in high school — how could you show up to homecoming or prom without a guy to hold hands with? However, I was not the typical middle or high school girl. Although I've considered some guys attractive, I'm almost 20 years old and have never had a serious crush or dated anyone. The only school dance I even attended was my junior prom — and I went with friends.
However, many girls do not realize the importance of waiting for the person God set aside for them or even understand God's immense love for them. As a result, they seek love early on through their teen years, hoping that their significant other will care for them and tell them they are special. Some girls even cycle through a few different boyfriends in high school because they will settle for a relationship with anyone who utters those three words that can melt even the hardest hearts — "I love you."
How did I avoid the dating status quo? I know God pairs up two people who are meant for each other — whether or not they choose to acknowledge it — and believed He had the right guy waiting for me. I really do believe my "Boaz" is out there and I continue waiting for God to bring him into my life when the time is right. Of course, this resulted in some of my friends, both Christian and non-Christian, calling me picky and naive. Nonetheless, I felt staying single throughout high school and even my first two collegiate years was one of the best decisions I've ever made. Yes, I have waited quite a long time and still haven't met this mystery man.
One of the reasons many marriages today fail is because people do not know who they are and still try to figure themselves out while, at the same time, getting to know the person they want to spend the rest of their lives with. When I started college, I hoped to eventually find the right guy. However, I knew I needed to figure out who I was before I even thought about the possibility of a relationship. I also realized the man God has for me needed this time to figure himself out as well.
Marriages also fail today because people fail to understand the significance of marriage. God created marriage so we could understand Christ's relationship with the church, something which Paul describes in Ephesians 5:22-32 as a "great mystery." I want to ensure that I remain forever faithful to the covenant I form with him through thick and thin. I hope to stand at the altar and say "I do" with confidence and conviction because I know I'm marrying the right man.
Successful marriages are God-centered. I knew I had to strengthen my relationship with God first and also allow time for my future husband's relationship with the Lord to flourish. I have grown so much in my relationship with the Lord over the past two years and discovered my identity is found in Him. Even though I've grown both individually and spiritually, I will not rush things and allow God to keep determining my footsteps.
So does 'the one' exist? Yes, but the term should be 'God's one.' Your Boaz is out there, but God will reveal him to you in His timing if you guard your heart and save it for this special someone.
