I wholeheartedly believe that everyone has both strengths and weaknesses, but that in most people the strengths outweigh the weaknesses. I think that one of the keys is to recognize the flaws and the faults, because once we recognize them we can begin to work on them. We are aware and we are mindful and we can strive to be and do better. I also think it's important to stay humble so that we don't get hung up on our virtues and start living in our egos. I feel like I am constantly asking myself, "What can I do better? How can I be better?" and just when I think that I have made some headway, another one of my flaws or defects surfaces and gives me something new to fix.
Someone told me recently that there really is no such thing as balance in life. Something will always be slipping and something else will always be taking priority. I think that the same ca be said about working through flaws and defects, they will never entirely dissipate. We will never be perfect people, but we can be divine works in progress. We will never "have it all together" and we should probably stop pressuring ourselves to get that way, because we will never live up to our own standard and we will continually disappoint ourselves and make ourselves miserable.
For example, I am a very poor time manager, I tend to be a little lazy, I am bad with money, and I am a slob. However, I will drop anything for my friends if they need me, I value time with my kids over a clean house, I like to live life and do things and I don't see price tags on making the most of life. I have a tendency to only see the things about myself that I don't like or to boost myself up so much that I don't see where I am falling short. The key here is that I am working on it. I am trying. I am seeking, continuously to do and be better.
I find that the people I meet are hesitant to show their flaws or to admit them. We are all so busy striving for some standard that more than likely does not exist that we don't want people to know where we fall short, struggle, or when we experience self-doubt. Never has there been anything less healthy than trying to live up to unattainable ideals and standards. Take a moment, embrace your flaws. Make a list of your strengths. Maybe think about how they balance each other out or which ones weigh you down.
Instead of pretending like everything is sunshine and rainbows, maybe admit out loud that you take an antidepressant or other psych med. Maybe it's worth admitting that, in your opinion, no dress size is worth giving up cake. Perhaps it won't be the end of the world if you say out loud that sometimes you just plain don't like your children. Maybe take a second to remind yourself that you are kind and caring or that you wear your heart on your sleeve. Stand in the mirror and appreciate your smile for a second. Laugh at your own jokes and don't feel weird about it, you're funny to yourself and it's how you see yourself that matters most.
Embrace your virtues, fiercely. Embrace your vices, softly. Take time to let go of standards of perfection and to embrace the beautifully flawed human being that you are. Good and bad lives in all of us. Acknowledge it, give it a place in your life. Move on accordingly. There is no room in this world for perfect people and for that reason, perfect people do not exist.
