As anyone who has seen the news can see, the struggle is real. The world we live in is becoming a scarier place everyday. It seems like we’re hearing tragic stories of rape, murder and terrorist attacks almost daily.
But what about when the hardest struggle for you is inside your head? What about when your worst enemy is yourself? According to Mental Health America, major depression is one of the most common mental illnesses that affects more than 16 million adults in America, each year. Depression can change the way you view yourself and the world around you. It lies to you and tries to kick you while you’re down. So here are twelve lies I’ve learned from my personal experience with depression and why not to listen.
1. “Don’t get up yet. There’s no reason to get out of bed.”
Get out of bed. Please don’t stay there and get lost in your thoughts. You woke up this morning and get a chance at a new day. Get up. Get moving! Exercise is the easiest (and cheapest, for you college students out there) way to relieve symptoms of depression. Sometimes that first step is the hardest, but you will feel so much better once you do!
2. “That homework/paper/project can wait. Wouldn’t it be nicer to lay down for a little while?”
Don’t fall into this trap, because that’s exactly what it is. I know you can struggle to find motivation, so let others help you find it. Reach out to a friend, classmate or coworker and ask them to meet up with you to work on your homework/paper/project. Reward yourself when you finish. You deserve it!
3. “Oh, your friends want to see you? All you’re going to do is ruin their fun. Stay home.”
Isolating yourself will not make you feel better. Depression can make you lose interest in the things you used to enjoy, like going out with friends. Try to do the things that make you happy, or find things that provide joy. Reconnect with friends. Go to that movie night. Ask that cute guy/girl out. Take that Zumba class.
4. "If you tell someone how you feel, they'll think you're crazy."
Let’s get something straight. Depressed does NOT equal crazy. Got it? Good.
5. “Nobody could possibly understand how you feel.”
Often when I would be in a bad place, I would think no one could possibly understand the way I felt. However, I found that when I would open up to a trusted friend and stopped treating “depression” like a bad word, I was surprised to find that many people not only understood, but were feeling the same way I was! Opening up lets you express yourself and helps you know that you’re not alone. Trust me, you’re not alone.
6. “You’re not worth it.”
You are. You are SO worth it. You are here for a reason. You have a wonderful purpose. Think about how amazing that is. You are here to accomplish things, to learn lessons, to make mistakes, and to touch lives. All you have to do is just keep swimming.
7. “Look at you, you’re hideous.”
Stop. Look in a mirror. All those flaws, all those things things you wish you could change, all those things you wish you could make bigger or smaller, and even the rare part you may like about yourself — they make you, YOU. You’re fearfully and wonderfully made. Nothing is a mistake.
8. “You’ll never amount to anything.”
You are the main determining factor in your success (not to mention everyone’s definition of success is different). Now I’m not saying that it’s not harder for some people to be successful, but think of it from a different perspective. Sometimes doors have to shut so others can open. Don’t let one “failure” make you think you can never amount to anything, but you don’t have to take my word for it. Read this list of famous people who who failed at their first attempts at success.
9. “YOU are the problem.”
Depression is a medical condition. It’s not “all in your head”. You wouldn't let your diabetes go untreated and just hope it gets better (or at least I hope you wouldn’t) so don’t do the same with depression. Depression is real. Treat it that way.
10. “No one can help you. Nothing’s going to get better. ”
Know that just because things are hard right now doesn’t mean things will stay that way. You are never too far gone to get help. Things get better. Talk to someone about it (which you can do for free and anonymously.) See a therapist or counselor. Do things you love. When you start to lose hope, remember there has to be rain before there can be a rainbow.
11. “No one loves you.”
This was a big one for me, but this just wasn’t true at all. I had so many friends and family in my corner rooting for me. I just couldn’t see it from the low place I was. I learned something else too. I could learn to love myself.
Woah. That was a game changer.
12. “Everyone would be better off without you.”
No. Don’t allow yourself this thought. This is a scary place to be, and it’s not true. You are important. Your life is meaningful. You have a purpose. Don’t give up on yourself.
If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please call 1-800-273-8255 (24-hour hotline). If someone’s life is in danger, call 911 immediately. From someone who has lost three friends to suicide, please take every threat seriously.
Now that I’ve exposed some of the lies depression makes you believe, let’s work to raise awareness and stop treating depression like a bad word. Share your personal story on social media using the hashtag #saytheword.
