Some people resort to self-destructive behaviors. Some people cry, and some people act crazy. It can destroy your self esteem, and this can present itself in fear of all men, or - at other times, victims may have sex with many men. Sometimes it can destroy you, and some people may find the courage to use it to make themselves stronger. Some may find their voice and be able to speak out , others will remain silent forever. We all have one thing in common, however, and that is that we have all bnen disrespected, used, and humiliated.
It takes a lot of guts to find your voice when these kinds of things happen, because society often favors the assaulter and not the victim. There are still many stigmas surrounding sexual assault, and often, people will talk. There will always be people who say that the assault was “your fault”. There will always be instances where someone will deny what happened to you as being “actual rape”. If you feel like it was rape, it was rape. If you did not consent 100% and completely while sober, it is considered rape. Don’t let anyone shame you, or tell you that you’re crazy or that what happened to you wasn’t significant. If it was significant to you, it matters.
Many victims are afraid to come forward because they don’t want to face the negative consequences that often come along with it. There is so much hatred and judgement in our society regarding women, but please just know that it is not your fault. Even if you were wearing revealing clothes, or if you were a little too drunk, you were never asking for it. No matter what you do, you have the right to get drunk and wear what you want without being in fear of sexual assault. You shouldn’t have to live in a world that judges you for what you wear. You shouldn’t have to live in fear that every time you get drunk, someone could potentially take advantage of you.
This article is for all of you, who were sexually assaulted and never said anything about it or who never came forward for fear of society’s judgment on you. Please know that I hear your voice, and that I support you in whatever you do. You are not alone. You have a voice, and you have a choice on what to do with it. Whatever you decide to do, and even if you don’t come forward, please know that none of what has happened to you is your fault. You are more than what has happened to you. You are still a whole person regardless of what has been taken away from you. You are loved, and accepted, and honestly? Fuck anyone that tries to tell you that what happened to you wasn't significant. Only you can decide what hurt you or how to feel about it. You are entitled to be upset, hurt, and angry, and even if you never voice your opinion, just know that it matters.
