Today was my last first day of school and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. I am officially a senior and those words give me feelings of excitement, nervousness, and anxiety. I know what I've heard about senior year, but it all conflicts with each other. Will I hate it or will I love it? Is it a time to kick back or a time to stress, maybe even more than junior year? While I don't know exactly what is in store for me I know what I expect will happen.
People are not joking around with you when they say that high school goes by quick. I still feel like I am a freshman entering a new environment with all new people. But instead I am a senior, the top of the class, the oldest in the school, the one people look up to. As much as I don't want it to, I expect this year to go by in a flash. My first day was very interesting as I learned that I would see some of my favorite people only in lunch. My best friend who I've had science with since I've met her is no longer there and my study hall buddy has early dismissal. Its extremely weird and scary to not be with them in the classes anymore.
Today might have not been the best day when it comes to my classes but my friends and teachers made up for it.
Thank you to my old European History Teacher who greeted me with smiles and hugs. You don't even know how much that made my day at least a little bit better. Thank you to my old Algebra 2 teacher who was very cheery and smiley as always. Thank you to my freshman cousin who I gave a ride to and he never fails to make me laugh. Then theres my boyfriend who I saw as I was walking in and leaving which made my day start and end pretty greatly. Back to my buddy from study halls who I saw in lunch and hugged, thank you for actually accepting the first hug and not punching me in the face. I really truly appreciate you all, and would not have survived today without these moments.
I expect a lot of tears. A lot of tears because of homework and deadlines, but also tears because the future is scary. Because maybe the college I want to go to actually accepted me (or didn't though I'd prefer that to not happen). Tears because I have to leave all of my friends behind. Tears because, although I will keep in touch with some, there are friends that I am only friends with simply because of the fact that we go to school together. Which that is truly a sad and scary thought.
Im expecting a lot of change which I am trying to prepare myself for. I know this year might be an extremely hard year or an extremely great year, or maybe a little bit of both.
Well, this gets posted about half a week after my first day, so I hope this week gets better than my first stressful day. To all the seniors that read this; I hope your year is fantastic.
