Spice girls said it best, “if you wanna be my lover you got to get with my friends.” And while '90s pop songs aren’t exactly great literature they always seem to be right about a thing or two. One of the trickiest parts about friendships can be how well your relationship is with your bestie's significant other. Between feeling left out or just not liking the guy it can cause a huge strain on you and your friends relationship.

During most beginning stages of a relationship a couple wants to be around each other all the time, mostly because they don’t know each well enough yet to realize how everyone needs a little space. So instead of late night Sonic runs or watching bad Netflix movies until one in the morning with your bestie, you are waiting for a text only to see her post a cute (nauseating) picture of the two of them on her Snapchat story. And while you are happy that one of you actually made it off the die alone with your cats/dogs island you still can’t help miss your time together. Because let’s face it your two’s snap chat stories were always way funnier.

Eventually it gets better. They start to have boys' night and y'all have girl time. You force yourself into their relationship and hang around like an unwanted sister wife. But it’s okay because he knows better than to make you upset. And that works most of the time. He becomes your friend too and you all can hang out and spend time together but you also don’t feel left out when they have alone time anymore.

Getting past the third wheeling is easy especially if you really like the guy that has swept your friend off her feet, but what happens when you just cannot stand him? Maybe he talks way too loud or tries too hard to be funny. Or he acts like he is smarter than you and then tries to prove it by having an argument with you about anything. Maybe he quotes every movie he has every watched or parties too much. Whatever it is the boy straight up annoys you. But while religiously talking about the "Walking Dead" might make you want to blow your brains out your best friend thinks it’s kind of adorable. So it’s okay if maybe he doesn’t have a single thing in common with you, because it’s her he is dating and she does like the fact that when he makes a sarcastic comment he just wants to make her laugh. He isn’t your soulmate so you don’t have to love him, but maybe roll your eyes in your head the next time he makes that horribly awful joke.

While you should be happy for your friends when they find guys that make them happy even if you wouldn’t particularly want to spend every day with them, or any day with them. There are times when guys are straight up awful to your friends. If a guy becomes emotionally or physically abusive it’s okay to sit her down and show her that is not okay for anybody to be treated that way. But if the guy just isn’t your cup of tea don’t ruin it for her. Because you have to remember that as much as you are her soulmate too, when she is waking up one morning in 10, 20, 40 years from now it isn’t going to be you lying next to her. She is going to be waking up beside whatever guy was lucky enough to win her heart and that’s beautiful. And okay because you will just be a few doors down or a phone call away whenever she is ready to admit that those jokes really weren’t that funny, his butt just looked really good in his jeans that night.