To the “other woman",
Sadly, there's multiple of you. Not just in my relationship, but in most. The saddest part of all is that you probably don't even realize you're the other woman. And if you don't, then this letter is for you.
I know a lot of times it's the woman that gets blamed for the man's infidelity. But it's time that we stop putting woman against woman and make the man own up to his wrongdoings.
I know that when you found out about me, you were probably just as hurt as I was to find out about you. You probably had these emotions of shame, anger, and betrayal.
Shame because you can't believe you let yourself believe that you were actually important to this guy. Shame that you could be so naive to think that he was different than others. And the shame that you hurt another person.
Anger because he used you. Anger because what he wasn't getting from you he was getting from someone else. Anger because you didn't realize how much his actions affected you until he hurt you.
Betrayal because he betrayed your trust. He manipulated you and made you believe whatever he wanted you to. Betrayal because he told you he cared about you and turns out he didn't.
I know this because I felt those same things. Except, I was actually supposed to be in a relationship with him. Heck, maybe you were supposed to be in a relationship with him too. But the problem is, we let those emotions manifest and instead of taking them out on him, we forgive him and we blame each other.
You didn't know I existed when you were the “other woman", and you may still not know who I am, but I know you do. And I just wanted to let you know that I am not angry with you. I would say I forgive you, but there's nothing to forgive. You were only looking for the same thing I was... love.
But we both got screwed over.