To The Girl Who Compares Herself
Start writing a post

To The Girl Who Compares Herself

You're not alone. I know exactly how you feel.

To The Girl Who Compares Herself

This letter is for the girl who walks down the hallway and covets the talent, physical features, or personality of another girl. This letter is for the girl who scrolls through Instagram seeing hundreds of "likes" and comments of compliments and emojis that her own posts lack. This letter is for the girl who stands in front of the bathroom mirror scrutinizing every part of her body with another girl in mind and asks herself why she doesn't look like her.

If you can relate to the above, please know you're not alone. I know exactly how you feel.

When I was very little, I had a lot of confidence. I was happy in my own skin, and I made sure to express that. It wasn't until I went to high school and became more serious about dance as a career that I began to doubt myself. I would watch myself dance in the mirror and wonder if I really had what it takes to be a professional dancer. I grew tired of looking at myself, so I began to look at the other dancers in my studio. I watched dancers with better technique and began to doubt my own. I began to feel that no matter how hard I worked in class, I would never be "good enough" to dance in college or perform professionally. I watched dancers with bodies that I thought were more aesthetically pleasing than my own, so I looked at myself and decided that was the reason I wouldn't succeed.

When I wrongfully convinced myself that I was undesirable and unworthy of a professional career, it wasn't long before I began to hate myself, which regretfully led to self harm. I would cut my legs believing I would never have a career as a dancer, but despite all of this, I kept dancing. Although I doubted myself every class, I couldn't stop doing what I loved the most. I was more afraid of quitting dance altogether than of rejection. As I worked harder and tried to improve with every class, I grew more confident in my technique and consequently, I stopped comparing myself to other dancers. I realized that the beauty of dance is that no two dancers move alike, and each individual has their own unique movement qualities. If I continued to compare myself and try to dance like someone else, I wouldn't be a dance major at an accredited university today with other dancers who are strong in their own beautiful technique.

Comparing yourself to someone else is a waste of who you are as an individual. If you keep trying to look like, act like, or dance like someone else, you'll never know who you are and what you're capable of. Instead, discover the qualities that make you different, because these are what make you special and beautiful. Be confident in expressing yourself. Before you know it, others will notice your beauty, intelligence, talent, humor, kindness, and all the other qualities that make you incredible. Don't forget that the first step is to believe in yourself instead of comparing yourself.

"A rose can never be a sunflower and a sunflower can never be a rose. All flowers are beautiful in their own way, and that's like women too." -Miranda Kerr

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers


Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series


Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

How Young Feminists Can Understand And Subvert The Internalized Male Gaze

Women's self-commodification, applied through oppression and permission, is an elusive yet sexist characteristic of a laissez-faire society, where women solely exist to be consumed. (P.S. justice for Megan Fox)

Paramount Pictures

Within various theories of social science and visual media, academics present the male gaze as a nebulous idea during their headache-inducing meta-discussions. However, the internalized male gaze is a reality, which is present to most people who identify as women. As we mature, we experience realizations of the perpetual male gaze.

Keep Reading... Show less

It's Important To Remind Yourself To Be Open-Minded And Embrace All Life Has To Offer

Why should you be open-minded when it is so easy to be close-minded?


Open-mindedness. It is something we all need a reminder of some days. Whether it's in regards to politics, religion, everyday life, or rarities in life, it is crucial to be open-minded. I want to encourage everyone to look at something with an unbiased and unfazed point of view. I oftentimes struggle with this myself.

Keep Reading... Show less

14 Last Minute Valentine's Day Gifts Your S.O. Will Love

If they love you, they're not going to care if you didn't get them some expensive diamond necklace or Rolex watch; they just want you.


Let me preface this by saying I am not a bad girlfriend.

I am simply a forgetful one.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

10 Helpful Tips For College Students Taking Online Courses This Semester

Here are several ways to easily pass an online course.

Photo by Vlada Karpovich on Pexels

With spring semester starting, many college students are looking to take courses for the semester. With the pandemic still ongoing, many students are likely looking for the option to take online courses.

Online courses at one time may have seemed like a last minute option for many students, but with the pandemic, they have become more necessary. Online courses can be very different from taking an on-campus course. You may be wondering what the best way to successfully complete an online course is. So, here are 10 helpful tips for any student who is planning on taking online courses this semester!

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments