We were friends for days before we started dating. You were the first boy to ever give me attention. Of course, I didn't give it any second thoughts when we got together. I wanted to make you happy. I was willing to do anything. My Mom knew everything that happened. She wanted me to focus on school. I wanted to focus on you. We were so young, but I was swept away with the magic of one's first relationship.
Unfortunately, you couldn't have cared less. You had plenty of girls before you chose me. You didn't feel the same magic I did. You felt that I was just a way to pass time. It was bliss at first. It was everything I had wanted. You showed me off to your friends. You would show me off around town. We were the most popular couple. We were the happiest.
It all started to go downhill when you missed a day at school. You were back on the bus the next day, but you weren't sitting with me. You were sitting with another girl. You went to kiss her, and she freaked out. She was angrily whispering about how you were with me. You looked over at me, and you simply said, "Not anymore." I ran into the school after and went straight to a hiding spot. I stayed there for the whole day. I was destroyed.
From that point on things got worse. You would kick me to the curb, and then you would tell me you loved me again. You would leave me behind for another girl, and then you would show up begging for my heart. We were always on and off. We were like that for two years, but I think the longest we were together was two months.
Right from the beginning my confidence started to dwindle. Every split we had broke me down just a little bit more. Eventually, I was at rock bottom. I didn't care about my grades. I didn't care about my friends. I didn't care about my family. I cared about manipulation. I became cynical really fast. I knew how to hit your ego in all the right spots, and with every ego hit you would come running back to me. I wasn't the sweet little girl anymore. I was the cold and heartless girl that you held on your arm.
You constantly were tearing me down. You would call me things like "slut" or "cunt." I didn't care. I knew I was manipulating you to get what I wanted. It did hurt sometimes though. I wasn't used to such hatred. That was what we were. We were two people that hated each other but couldn't live without each other. It disgusted me to kiss you or even look at you, but we had to keep up the appearance. You still were able to see the world with me, but I saw nothing with you. I didn't really see a future for myself either. I saw a sad life loving a drug addict. I saw a life of being afraid of authorities that were meant to protect us. I saw the end with you, not the beginning.
That was how it ended. You turned me into the worst possible person I could be. You led me to believe that my future was really a nightmare. You created a monster that would follow every command. Then I left, and it was the best thing I had ever done. It turned my bleak future into a bright one. You were gone, and I was a better person. Now you're just a sore spot in my past, and not a disaster in my future.
