Over the course of my life, I have been put in every kind of social situation imaginable. From being in class, giving a presentation, to being at a bar trying to talk to someone, there is nothing I feel is unfamiliar to me. What I would love to do is share what I have gathered with the readers of Odyssey.
To begin: Confidence is your number one ally. People will inherently be more driven to hear what you have to say --- if it sounds like you believe in it. Posture and eye contact are the keys to confidence. In the first thirty-seconds of you making conversation those traits will be on the forefront. My tip for posture is roll your shoulders, rolling them back will help straighten your physique. Eye contact is not so simple. You must consistently remind yourself about your level of eye contact. I have found that is something that almost all human beings need to work on, and it has to be a priority.
The next step is something I call "conversation etiquette". These are the rules and regulations of talking to someone, or multiple individuals as well. Questions are very important at this stage. In order from a person or group to truly be invested in you, you need to appear equally invested in them. Specific questions about what they are saying such as, "What is your opinion on that?" . Human beings love to talk about what they think and believe, asking a person their opinion on a subject is a great way to continue a conversation. Another rather obvious portion of this stage is listening. It goes without saying that you should listen to the person/group is speaking to you. I am specifically referring to "intensive listening". This is appearing verbally and visually, interested and even intrigued by what the person is saying.
My final piece of advice refers to when to end a conservation. You have to know when to walk away. If it appears that the person/group is not exhibiting the same level of interest in what you are saying, get out of the conversation. Your self-worth is so key in this portion. Many of you probably are thinking, well if this is a presentation or a similar situation, how do you "walk away" from that? You can wrap up the presentation in way that ends it faster, therefore removing you from the negative situation.
The fact is that all of these attributes are incredibly difficult to master, as I still have not. You must not get discouraged and keep trying. People can be quite critical and even sometimes cruel. With that being said, keep your head high and push on. Never be afraid to talk to that new person.
