She stares at her phone in awe, her stomach churning at the idea of sending a simple text message. The screen glares at her, daring her to make a decision. She knows feeling this way is stupid, that she doesn't need to. Yet she sits frozen in this feeling, unsure of how to ask for help when all she honestly needed was an extra hand for a project.
There's this stigma, this association with asking for help that leaves a feeling of guilt trapped in one's stomach. There's this idea of aloneness when asking for something that seems to be a simple gesture.
As children we are encouraged to ask questions for things we don't understand, ask for help in understanding. A help in expanding our knowledge and allowing for all of us to come to a terms of agreement. Yet now, questions are labeled as "stupid" and "uneducated". Things are constantly becoming more biased as to always assert someone's level of intelligence or capability as superior to the inferior, the one asking for help.
Questions and seeking understanding simply can't label someone as inferior or incapable. Instead, it often shows a desire to grow, a desire to learn and broaden horizons that may be unexplored to them. It may explain the hand they are dealt. Perhaps they need a loan of something as small as $1. So, they sit and feel the need to explain themselves for that single dollar with phrases like "I don't normally do this..." or, "I'm so sorry but..." when in reality, they could ask for a lot more but are settling for something that will get them by for the time being.
Asking for help is seen as a sign of weakness, regardless in what manner or setting. Often times children hold questions, terrified by the thought of looking dumb, and then being harassed. A lot of people refrain from asking for help with money, etc, because they feel this belittles their worth, whereas they are exploring other options to make it through the day.
Help is a sign of recognizing that you cannot do something alone. It's a sign of reaching out to those you trust and have confidence in and asking them for assistance as you gladly assist themselves with.
Help is an opportunity, partially for the party asking for help, and the other party for proceeding in the act. It's a way of coming together, of learning more about yourself and others and finding a true source of not just sympathy, but empathy as well.
The walls come down often times when someone asks for assistance, and it allows for you both to have deepened conversations then the usual daily dialogue.
So why aren't we thinking of help as a positive thing? Why is asking a simple favor seen as constant dependency, instead of simply becoming a symbol of growth, a symbol of caring, and how communities come together, how we as humans begin to strive.
