We all have our breakdowns and our moments. We all have that breaking point we never want to get to. Some people get to that breaking point, some people don't know what to do at that breaking point. Some people self-harm. There are so many things NOT to say to someone who self-harms (cuts).
Have I self-harmed? Yes, I have. Am I proud of it? No, I am not.
We all have our struggles with trying to fit in, or trying to be successful in life. We try and trust people, but when someone who we trust says this stuff; it hurts us even more.
1. "That's fucked up"
Yes, we know its fucked up, and no, we don't do it because we like how fucked up it is. Say "That's fucked up" just pushes us more into guilt and have us feel bad.
2. "You are so dramatic"
No, we are not dramatic, we are trying to find a way to cope from all the hurting we are feeling!
3. "You are too pretty/handsome to cut"
Just because someone is pretty/handsome doesn't mean they aren't hurting in life.
4. "This is your fault"
HOW!!?? Please tell us HOW it's our fault!? So basically, you are saying it's our fault that we are bullied, that we are made fun of, or how we are judged by every little thing we do!?
5. "Promise me you won't cut again"
We can't.
6. "Stop doing it for attention"
That's the worst thing someone could say. Some people are cutting because they DON'T want attention; such as NEGATIVE attention. For example, bullying, getting embarrassed during school, or your name just coming out of other people's mouths. Also, most people hide their scars, so just saying.
7. "Just stop"
Do you think we don't want to stop? Do you think it's easy for us to stop?
8. "You don't need me"
Yes, we do. Some people who cut need someone to help them through the pain, and to help them cope. Saying "you don't need me" is the most heartbreaking thing because that person doesn't know how much they DO need them.
9. "Shouldn't you be getting help?"
This is the most offensive thing to say. I'll tell you why, because we know we need help, and that's OUR business NOT yours. Unless we come to you and ask for help, just stay out of it.
10. "Stop being so selfish"
This one really gets me. Saying this WILL make us feel really bad and hate ourselves even more! It's not that we are being selfish, because WE AREN'T. With everything that happens we need to try and escape and think about ourselves for once. Especially when you care about everyone, and you never put yourself first. THAT is NOT selfish!
Please take my advice, and watch what you say to someone who self-harms, or wants to self-harm.
