Things To Do And To Have For Self Care

10 Things You Need For Self-Care

It'll change your life.

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Self-care is important to always do, even if it is in small ways. I have been able to overcome stressful situations and terrible times just by practicing self-care strategies and routines. But it's hard to have routines if you're a busy person, or if something comes up because life happens. So here are a few things you can do to help promote self-care if you're on the go and things to have with you, whether it be on your person or just in your room to help with self-care. It goes a long way if you make sure that you keep yourself happy and healthy in both body and mind.

1. A chapstick that you love

Taylor Wreesman - Burt's Bees Chapstick

Personally, I'm a Burts Bee's person, but whatever chapstick feels good to put on, always have it nearby. Chapstick is an easy way to help your lips feel good. Having non-chapped and soft feeling lips always helps me feel better about myself and I feel that it helps my outwards appearance towards others.

2. A person you can trust

Pixabay - Holding hands

This can be anyone you want it to be. A best friend, boyfriend, parent, roommate, literally anyone that you can go to when you're feeling down or when you have a problem. For me, this is usually my boyfriend, my best friend or my mom, all people who I know will listen if I have a problem or if I'm feeling down. Most of the time, just talking without thinking is a good release for built up emotion and any pent-up energy inside.

3. A good lotion and body wash

Taylor Wreesman - Lubriderm lotion

Feeling clean is ALWAYS a good start for self-care. Even if you're not due for a shower, take one anyways. Get your most expensive or your favorite body wash and hop in a warm shower. Just five or six minutes in the shower can ease body tension and stress. Plus with your favorite body wash, you can ease into relaxation with feeling clean and smelling good. Then afterwords if you also have a favorite lotion, put that on as well. I have been able to help myself feel relaxed by just putting on lotion. And don't just put it on exposed areas, put it on every inch of skin. You'll want to feel completely moisturized and soft for the full self-care to sink in.

4. Putting on clean clothes.

Good Stock - washing machine

Many people don't think to put clean clothes on when they're not in the best mood. We just grab what's closest or what's comfortable and don't think about whether it's clean or not. Similar to getting into clean sheets (which I also recommend for self-care), clean clothes are a necessity to make sure that self-care goes all the way. Get into clean clothes all the way down to your socks and underwear. Settling in dirty clothes or already worn clothes will easily defeat the purpose of taking that nice shower. Having a clean body and clean clothes helps with having a clean and relaxed mind.

5. A favorite candle, wax melt, essential oil, or scent

Taylor Wreesman - Essential oil diffuser

Once you've gotten into your clean clothes with your clean body, let's have a good smelling room. My favorite thing to help me relax in my dorm room specifically is an essential oil diffuser, or otherwise, I'd use a candle. Unless you've used both a scented body wash and a scented lotion, having your room be filled in your favorite scent is one of the most relaxing things. It provides a sense of comfort and stability that you can sink into.

6. Having comfy stuff like blanket, pillow, chair, etc.

Taylor Wreesman - pillows, blankets, and teddy bear

After turning on your diffuser, lighting a candle, or melting some scented wax, it is now time to get into your comfy spot. This can be the mound of pillows and blankets on your bed that you can sink into, a bean bag chair, or maybe it's your desk chair with a blanket around your shoulders. Either way, find the spot where you can be comfortable to maximize relaxation.

7. Music

Taylor Wreesman - Spotify playlist

Music is one of the universal ways that I've seen that can help people when they're feeling down. Hop on Spotify, Apple Music, Pandora, or your favorite radio station and let the music drown out whatever is making noise in your mind. Being able to drown out all the extra noise and whatever is bugging me by listening to music has always helped me relax.

8. An activity you enjoy

Taylor Wreesman - "The Best of Me" by Nicholas Sparks

Now you're in your comfy spot, you've listened to your music or are still listening to your music, now it's time to enjoy yourself. This can be different for each person, but start something you enjoy doing. For some, it may be a movie, a book, or even taking a nap. But doing something that you enjoy and makes you happy it is crucial to self-care.

9. Spot or area that’s private (as much as it can get)

Pixabay - lounge chair

If you're a college student like I am, it can be a little hard to find a private space, but all it can take is a pair of earbuds or maybe the dark space under your bed. Finding a spot where you can release bottled up emotion is needed for self-care. Keeping emotions bottled up for too long can be detrimental to your health. So every so often the release of emotion, whether it is messy or not, is important.

10. Meditation website or guide

Pixabay - Meditating woman

There are times where I cannot use any of the methods listed above whether it's an issue of time, situation, or just how bad of a day that I am having. So when this happens, I take a couple of minutes and go on MindfulPause.org and force myself to take some time and meditate. It is good to have a site or a routine that you can do for five minutes that can calm the brain and cause relaxation. Take a weekend and explore meditation sites that you can use when you are having a bad day. Believe me, it will go a long way.

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Everything You Will Miss If You Commit Suicide

The world needs you.
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You won't see the sunrise or have your favorite breakfast in the morning.

Instead, your family will mourn the sunrise because it means another day without you.

You will never stay up late talking to your friends or have a bonfire on a summer night.

You won't laugh until you cry again, or dance around and be silly.

You won't go on another adventure. You won't drive around under the moonlight and stars.

They'll miss you. They'll cry.

You won't fight with your siblings only to make up minutes later and laugh about it.

You won't get to interrogate your sister's fiancé when the time comes.

You won't be there to wipe away your mother's tears when she finds out that you're gone.

You won't be able to hug the ones that love you while they're waiting to wake up from the nightmare that had become their reality.

You won't be at your grandparents funeral, speaking about the good things they did in their life.

Instead, they will be at yours.

You won't find your purpose in life, the love of your life, get married or raise a family.

You won't celebrate another Christmas, Easter or birthday.

You won't turn another year older.

You will never see the places you've always dreamed of seeing.

You will not allow yourself the opportunity to get help.

This will be the last sunset you see.

You'll never see the sky change from a bright blue to purples, pinks, oranges, and yellows meshing together over the landscape again.

If the light has left your eyes and all you see is the darkness, know that it can get better. Let yourself get better.

This is what you will miss if you leave the world today.

This is who will care about you when you are gone.

You can change lives. But I hope it's not at the expense of yours.

We care. People care.

Don't let today be the end.

You don't have to live forever sad. You can be happy. It's not wrong to ask for help.

Thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting.

Suicide is a real problem that no one wants to talk about. I'm sure you're no different. But we need to talk about it. There is no difference between being suicidal and committing suicide. If someone tells you they want to kill themselves, do not think they won't do it. Do not just tell them, “Oh you'll be fine." Because when they aren't, you will wonder what you could have done to help. Sit with them however long you need to and tell them it will get better. Talk to them about their problems and tell them there is help. Be the help. Get them assistance. Remind them of all the things they will miss in life.

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline — 1-800-273-8255

Cover Image Credit: Brittani Norman

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Being Ugly

What it means to me

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Due to a series of ongoing events throughout my semester, I've reconsidered what it means for someone to truly be ugly. Though it is often used in terms of appearance, I do not see it as such-- now more than ever. Ugliness runs deeper than appearance-- it runs within one's soul and festers into other areas of one's life, particularly in their treatment of others.

I view ugliness as someone's conscious capacity and implementation of malice. Taking time and energy out of your day to hurt someone else, that's what I view as ugly. Some offenses are more minor than others, however, it is still a conscious effort to hurt or affect someone else negatively-- and that's the source of the problem. I truly wonder what causes that sort of behavior in someone, as I, along with most people, simply do not invest time or energy into hating or plotting against others. It seems like a full-time job.

I can theorize all sorts of reasons as to why someone would act this way: hate, jealousy, vengeance, etc. Yet, all of these reasons don't hit the root reason. It almost seems that some people are just innately ugly in their soul. This alludes to the timeless debate of whether one's personality is due to nature or nurture. Again, although our surroundings and environment do have a large effect in our behavior, that alibi only goes so far when multiple people are placed in the same environment, in the same situation, and only some are willing to cross moral boundaries in order to hurt the others. Just because an environment applies pressure to people, does not mean everyone is going to act out in malice, and it certainly does not give everyone an excuse to do so. Some people are simply conniving and, well, ugly inside.

If you have ever encountered people like this, I know from personal experience that it is such a drag. You have an enemy, essentially, whether you chose to or not, however based on their hatred towards you, they are now considered an enemy, a hater, and any other associated term. Know that they will do anything in their power to bring you down, even if it requires bending the truth and creating elaborate schemes, but you have to keep on doing you. Let them obsess over ways to bring you down. At the end of the day, their time and energy is being invested into bringing you down, while yours is being used to build yourself up. They will fall by default. So, keep your head high, act in grace, and make your money. They can sip on their Haterade and watch from below.

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