So, like everyone already knows, life is sometimes a complete nightmare. It also has an interesting habit of being simultaneously hilarious. One of these strange moments arose the other day as I was interacting with a complete stranger who happened to be gorgeous. I mean he was just so nice to look at. For a little background, he and I came into contact at my local pharmacy; I finally gave in to the cold that has been ravaging my body for weeks. I rolled up to that CVS is over sized sweatpants, a torn sweatshirt, no makeup, and the messiest of buns. It was not cute. But, I needed some cold medicine and I needed it bad.
The following is an account of this terribly awkward interaction:
FADE IN:
INT. PHARMACY - DAY
HARLEY, 21, enters the CVS. Her brown hair is falling from its bun. She dawns a torn sweatshirt and men's sweatpants tucked into five year old UGG Boots.
She meanders down the aisle before locating a collection of cold medicine. She selects a box, sneezes, then heads towards the register.
Behind the counter is ATTRACTIVE PHARMACY GUY (APG) a near Adonis like creature. He has thick hair, green eyes, and is at least 6 foot 4.
Harley makes her way to the counter in a cold-fueled fog. No one waits in line, so she walks directly to the counter. She tosses the medicine on the counter without looking at APG.
He smiles and picks the box up.
APG
Feeling a little under the weather?
HARLEY
(stuffy nose)
You've no idea.
APG
Yeah, it's that time of year.
He scans the box. She comes slightly out of her haze and looks at him.
Her eyes widen and her mouth falls open at the site of him. She instinctively tries to fix her hair and wipe the sleep from her eyes.
He notices and smiles.
APG
Do you have a CVS card?
Harley
Uhh, yeah. Not with me though.
APG
That's alright; you can use a phone number.
Harley
Umm sure. It's 610-7---
At this point, she lets out a sneeze so loud and aggressive, people walking outside turn to look. Also, a large pocket of mucus now hangs from her nose.
She places her hand over her face, but they are both aware of what has happened.
They finish the transaction in silence, she runs from the store, and prays that a large fire will engulf her as she has now become a snot-monster.
FADE OUT
So, as you can clearly see, life gets easily complicated and I can never go to that pharmacy again.
