The Problem With Weddings
Start writing a post
Relationships

The Problem With Weddings

How much of your big day is really yours?

519
The Problem With Weddings

Most couples dream of their wedding day. Most couples' wedding day is a dream come true. Weeks and months of planning, effort, and commitment go into the big production of a wedding. You spend hours making sure every detail is just right…but for who?

I find myself second-guessing wanting a big wedding and reception with each wedding that I attend now. Now, I myself am not engaged or married, but I've been around enough of the wedding process to see that this extremely special and intimate day is usually lost in making sure hundreds of people, that are not you or your significant, others are happy.

This doesn't sit right with me.

Seeing the bride and groom be so focused or stressed on making sure the arrangements for guests are just right is a major drawback for me and has me leaning towards wanting a destination wedding.

A destination wedding with just my family and close friends would be perfect and allow more focus on me and my fiancé, as well as way less stress in the planning and execution of the day's events.

On my wedding day, I do not want to be overwhelmed by attending to distant relatives or family friends. Sure, I want those I care about to be there and support me on my big day, but I'm sorry to selfishly say I'd rather not have extended family or distant friends be a part of my extremely special day.

Guest lists can get long quickly. If you invite this family, then you'll have to invite that one, and this person feels offended they weren't invited, and that person wants an invitation but doesn't plan on going, and so on and so forth.

When I get married I want to be able to focus on myself, my emotions, my fiancé, and the few close people who help us get to that day.

I don't think that is rude in the slightest bit. Often time, I feel that the family becomes entitled to invitations. Some relatives whom you do not even speak to feel the need to receive an invitation.

It's situations like these that make me second guess have the big reception type of wedding.

When I get married I want to be able to remember the day clearly. A lot of times brides say their big day was a blur, or they didn't get a chance to eat, or that the whole deal was overwhelming and they wish they'd done it differently.

I don't want to be like one of those brides. I want to remember feeling relaxed and ecstatic on my big day. I want to be able to clearly remember every detail because I was not distracted or overwhelmed.

I want to have positive memories of enjoying a meal with my new husband and family, not feeling rushed to eat and get back to making rounds to all the guests.

Is it selfish of me to want my big day to be just mine? It might be. But to each his own. I love going to weddings and I love being invited, but I just don't think the typical wedding is meant for me.

I'd hope that my relatives would be understanding. And I hope others who feel like I do about this find the same understanding from their families too. I'm not being rude or disrespectful I am simply trying to preserve the sacredness and intimacy of a wedding for me and mine to remember forever.

If it's selfish of me to think like this, then so be it.

Report this Content
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

92434
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

70968
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments