Most couples dream of their wedding day. Most couples' wedding day is a dream come true. Weeks and months of planning, effort, and commitment go into the big production of a wedding. You spend hours making sure every detail is just right…but for who?
I find myself second guessing wanting a big wedding and reception with each wedding that I attend now. Now, I myself am not engaged or married, but I've been around enough of the wedding process to see that this extremely special and intimate day is usually lost in making sure hundreds of people, that are not you or your significant, others are happy.
This doesn't sit right with me.
Seeing the bride and groom be so focused or stressed on making sure the arrangements for guests are just right is a major drawback for me and has me leaning towards wanting a destination wedding.
Destination wedding with just my family and close friends would be perfect and allow more focus on me and my fiancé, as well as way less stress in the planning and execution of the day's events.
On my wedding day, I do not want to be overwhelmed by attending to distant relatives or family friends. Sure, I want those I care about to be there and support me on my big day, but I'm sorry to selfishly say I'd rather not have extended family or distant friends be a part of my extremely special day.
Guest lists can get long quick. If you invite this family, then you'll have to invite that one, and this person feels offended they weren't invited, and that person wants an invitation but doesn't plan on going, and so on and so forth.
When I get married I want to be able to focus on myself, my emotions, my fiancé, and the few close people who help us get to that day.
I don't think that is rude in the slightest bit. Often time, I feel that family becomes entitled to invitations. Some relatives whom you do not even speak to feel the need to receive an invitation.
It's situations like these that make me second guess have the big reception type of wedding.
When I get married I want to be able to remember the day clearly. A lot of times brides say their big day was a blur, or they didn't get a chance to eat, or that the whole deal was overwhelming and they wish they'd done it differently.
I don't want to be like one of those brides. I want to remember feeling relaxed and ecstatic on my big day. I want to be able to clearly remember every detail because I was not distracted or overwhelmed.
I want to have positive memories of enjoying a meal with my new husband and family, not feeling rushed to eat and get back to making rounds to all the guests.
Is it selfish of me to want my big day to be just mine? It might be. But to each his own. I love going to weddings and I love being invited, but I just don't think the typical wedding is meant for me.
I'd hope that my relatives would be understanding. And I hope others who feel like I do about this find the same understanding from their families too. I'm not being rude or disrespectful I am simply trying to preserve the sacredness and intimacy of wedding for me and mine to remember forever.
If it's selfish of me to think like this, then so be it.