You’re standing somewhere you’ve been so many times with him before, somewhere many memories have been made. He looks at you with lost, cold blue eyes, and says, “I just don’t love you anymore.” You take the three hour drive home cursing yourself for thinking long distance would actually work in college. Crying your eyes out in the dead of night wondering, "What did I do wrong?" He makes you feel like you’re the crazy one. Three years wasted and all you want is to have that back.
Time passes, everything seems to be alright, the two of you apologize and try to make things work again. This always seems to be the problem. It’s far too difficult to actually let go, but one day you do. You start to assess what about him made you want to stay so bad. The history? The memories? You start to remember all the good times with him, and you just can’t anymore. All you can remember is how all the goodnight calls you tried to make were ignored only to be told the next day, "Sorry, I was just too busy." Plans that you worked so hard on to make perfect for him get cancelled, and he fails to mention it until last minute. The times you do spend together are just empty arguments.
Maybe you were just in love with the idea of him, or who he once was. Maybe you only loved the way the two of you looked together. People grow, people change and nothing ever really stays the same. You still can’t shake the feeling that there will never be anyone like him in your life again. Life does funny things, and no, you don’t find someone like him again. However, you do one day find yourself with someone even better.
Oddly enough, this is the last person you would expect. This is the person you take car trips with for no reason other than to sing off tune to every song. This is the person who drives you crazy in the best way possible. The person who makes you laugh until you forgot what you were so upset about in the first place. The strangest thing about it all is, he’s most certainly not your type. You can’t figure out how in the world he got stuck in your head. Maybe it was when the two of you locked eyes long enough to make your heart buzz with a new kind of radiating attraction. Perhaps it’s the way he lets you open up to him so easily, when you would rather have your heart guarded with mile high walls. He genuinely seems to care, and you’re not sure why. However, in that moment, you wouldn’t have it any other way.
It’s time to let your next do what your ex couldn’t, which is to give you his best. Love isn’t stressing over whether you are worth it or not. Love is knowing you are worth it and showing them that they are, too.
