Have you ever found yourself watching a particularly gruesome movie, maybe one in which the main characters suffers a gunshot to the leg, and realized that your leg has begun to ache as well? Do you get saddened at the sight of someone else crying? If so, good news! You are a person capable of strong empathy. You can put yourself in someone else's shoes and share the emotions and experiences of that person (to a certain extent). However, like all things, too much of a good trait can make a bad trait. A few people, myself being one, are what psychologists call extreme empaths. In other words, our mental and physical conditions rely mostly on those of the people around us. A person with hyperactive empathy's mirror neurons (the part of the brain that allows us to relate to each other) physically mirror the state of the people we are with. Weird right?
It gets weirder! Extreme empaths don't only strongly relate to feelings on the inside, they can feel the physical pain of others too. So, while many might cringe at a the sight of someone stubbing their toe, empaths will feel substantial pain in their toe. Of course, there are varying degrees of how intese the pain is, depending on how hyperactive the persons mirror nerouns are. But for most, the pain is pretty substantial and will continue until they convince themselves that harm isn't actually being inflicted upon them. Yes, this is actually a thing and yes, it actually hurts! A few weeks ago, a friend mentioned to me she had a terrible headache. Within seconds, my head was actually pounding and I could feel a warm, sharp pain travel up my spine and spread all over my head. Once, I overheard a conversation where someone was explaining what their knee surgery recovery was like. I was in line at Subway, and I looked like a crazy person becasue I had to find somewhere to sit ASAP because suddenly both of my knees felt like they were on fire.
For most of my life, I just thought I was a huge hypochondriac. I thought every pain I had was real and that I had every ailment I heard about. However, as I got older I realized that it did not only apply to my health. Whenever I see people cry (real life or television), I often have to hold back tears. If someone I'm with is angry or upset about something, I feel angry and upset too. For a long time, sometimes days. About what? That's right, nothing! I would get into frequent fights with my high school boyfriend because I would be angry or sad, and I couldn't explain to him why! I feel bad for the guy, he probably just thought I was moody as all get-out.
It's exhausting to take on extra emotions, and it's something I wish I could just turn off sometimes. It isn't all bad though. Being alone for a while is a quick cure for many. It allows them to asses how they feel, independent of what's going on. So don't take it personally if the lovable empaths in your life need to go on a walk alone or shut the door once and a while, its probably for the best. And best of all, having such a capacity for empathy leads many extreme empaths to take strides to decrease the suffering of those around them. You suffer less, we suffer less. Everyone wins!
Think you might be an extreme empath? Follow the links to learn more science behind below to find ways of dealing with extreme empathy in everyday life (they work, trust me). http://annasayce.com/how-to-turn-off-overactive-em...
