It was the hardest day of my life. My heart sank to stomach and I was at a loss for words. All I could do was sit at my computer chair in silence. I was thirteen years old when my whole world came tumbling down. It’s true when they say that a phone call can change your entire life in just seconds. September 3, 2007 is a day that others and myself will never forget. It was a day that our world became a little less bright, a little less fun, and a little less right. My heart ached. It ached so badly. I still couldn’t find it in me to accept that you were gone. I just couldn’t. The only thing that I could remotely process was all the pain I was feeling inside. It didn’t feel real. You couldn’t be gone. No way. Someone who was so full of life and had so much talent, there was just no way you could be gone.
It was hard. It was extremely hard to find a place to feel okay. It was hard to find the strength to feel at peace. At thirteen years old, it was difficult. It was difficult because it was hard to understand ‘why.’ "Why" is all anyone could ask. Losing you was most definitely the hardest time I had ever experienced in my life. Thirteen is so young and it is a very fragile age. Losing someone that was so close to me was very hard to overcome. Losing you meant losing a friend. It meant losing a daughter, a sister, a cousin, a granddaughter, and a niece. It meant losing someone that meant so much to so many people.
Your laugh and your smile always run through my head every so often, and your spirit lives within me. You taught me so much about life at such a young age, and rather than let your loss get the best of me, I allowed it to help me grow. It helped me grow into the strong, independent, hard working and good-hearted person that I have become today. I will forever be grateful and thankful for the friendship that we shared and how much life you brought to every single person you ever met. Though you may not be here with us, and the last nine years have felt like a lifetime, you will always be one of my best friends and inspiration. I love you forever and always.
