We both left for the summer without defining what we are, if we even are anything. I don’t know what I am to you, and that is confusing. All you left me with was a kiss and “I’ll FaceTime you,” We’ll keep in touch,” and “I’ll see you in August.”

You made this hard on me. My friends and family ask about you. “Are you together?” “Is he your boyfriend?” I don’t know how to respond because part of me feels like we aren’t just friends, so I can’t call us that, but the other part doesn’t even know what to call us.

It’s hard every time I talk to you because I just want to know what you are thinking. Are we friends? Are we more?

I know we now live in a hook-up culture. Everyone has been hurt, played and had their hearts broken. These days people just want to wait and “just see where things go.” But with you, I don’t want to just see where things go. Now, I do know that “What are we?” is a loaded question and by the time it is asked, feelings – maybe even strong ones – are in play. There is potential for more hurt.

I know our timing, meeting at the ending of the semester, wasn’t your fault. I know you can’t do anything about the 83 days apart. But, I have so many things I am urging to tell you, including how I really feel about you.

During this summer, I think about everything that happened between us. Our goodbye in the parking lot with me crying as I walked away replays in my head over and over. I cried then because I was saying goodbye to something and someone so special.

So, to the boy that left me confused during summer, I hope we pick up right where we left off in the fall. I hope that seeing you again helps my confusion. Lastly, selfishly I hope you feel the same way about me.