It's so essential for human beings to be aware of their self-worth, and to accept themselves regardless if the negativity seems to linger on. However, it's easier said than done. Sometimes it is extremely difficult to see and feel the acceptance within ourselves. It feels like you can't see your own shadow, you see someone else's instead. A part of you feels like it's drowning and you are trying to reach towards the shore. You feel insane for drowning towards the surface. You feel sane for drowning towards the surface.

I have been struggling with discovering my self-worth and acceptance all of my life, and it does not help that my depression, anxiety, my habit of comparing myself to others hinders from truly valuing myself; which can really affect the mind negatively. But over the years and even currently, I realized that I can't allow the darkness to consume the composure that I truly desire.

Self-doubt is one of my top idiosyncrasies. Sometimes I feel like I'm never enough, that the word "use" is written across my forehead. I have moments where I feel like I am never good, pretty, skinny, and intelligent enough, due to the all of the negative experiences that occurred in my life. It is highly stressful to keep with my masquerade, and not expose an ounce of vulnerability. I wish for the ubiquitous emotions to stop loitering around my head. The distance with myself can hurt so much, and making my heart to become insensible. All I desire is to have my heart to have constant heartbeats and self-love circulate in my veins.

However, I possess such great bonds with my friends and family. I value them so much, because they are the missing puzzles that complete and create a stunning masterpiece in my life. They've accepted my idiosyncrasies for so long, and helped me realize that I am Natalya Alexandra Cook, a future poetic inspiration to the world. A human being filled with so much ambition, compassion, and creativity. A person that always wants to diffuse happiness in any setting. A person who is resilient and has conquered a lot of struggles along her way. I am beautiful. I am intelligent. I do possess the strength to conquer anything in my path. I am GOOD enough.

I want to let you all know that reality can tend to be splattered with black ink, and sometimes you can't find the radiant colors to stroke your atmosphere in a happier setting; but all of you have the strength to get through anything. I know it feels like it's a repetitive cycle of confusion, hopelessness, loneliness, and all of those negative elements are making you crumble piece by piece. I know it feels like anything you do may seem like it's not enough. I know it feels so painful to endure each day, but this strongly showcases that you can alleviate your wounds. I know you may feel the heavy emptiness pounding its way through your heart, however always remember that you bolster yourself to shake all of the chagrin within yourself. Discovering your self-worth is like being an archaeologist. Don't ever question the veracity of having positivity diffuse within your mind and soul. Hold on, no matter how long it takes, because you will discover the radiant light within yourself.

Self-love, acceptance and worth are reflecting images of colorful haze. It's so exquisite that it latches on your heart and pulls you in. The beauty of those images clearly astounds you and provides you with aesthetic pleasure. It feels like the haze pulls you in closer to spaces that can't be filled. You have to remember that haze has two denotations. "A slight obscuration of the lower atmosphere, typically caused by fine suspended particles." Or "a state of mental obscurity or confusion." The question is which of those meanings are your reflecting image of self-love, acceptance, and worth. You will find your ocean. Eventually, the waves will erode the sadness, so you visualize the kindness and happiness that's in this world. You will feel sane for swimming towards the shore.