I was sitting in my dorm at 1:00AM with an incredible case of writer's block. The first thing you learn to do as a writer when you experience this brick wall that blocks every creative word and thought is to just begin to write about nothing. This is done so that hopefully an idea will come out of the mess.

I was looking for anything that seemed like a halfway decent idea and couldn't find anything anywhere inside of my brain. I decided to reach out and ask someone that I know who reads my posts every week for a creative jump start. I needed an idea that I could be certain people would click on and enjoy (thank you Lauren).

Following Lauren's ideas I just began to type.

An open letter to my future wife is what happened to come out of it all.

First,let me just say that you are so beautiful (I don't know for sure what you look like at this point but I'm sure that you are beautiful. Let's not forget that I may or may not have met you yet but that's beside the point). You are something so incredible that you could only be a gift from God and don't ever let me convince you or make you feel that you aren't exactly that. If at any point in our relationship you have felt that way, just remind me that you, like every other woman I've been with, you could do way better.

Secondly, I believe that a thank you from the bottom of my heart will be in order by now for you not walking away the minute we met in fear of my awkwardness and/or sarcasm that I'm positive was probably displayed at some point in the early stages of you and I.

When the time comes for you to read this, just know that it is now, always has been, and always will be you. I can already assure you that when I do find you there will be nobody else on this planet that I would be more willing to spend the rest of my life with.

When I fall for someone I admittedly fall hard, fall fast, and fall with the idea that I'll never have to pick myself up and walk away. You can rest assured that I am in this for the long haul.

This letter is my written promise to you that I am making now as a college student who has no idea who you may or may not be that I will never become what I have grown up near and "looked up" to. Those men that treated my mom and my family the way that they did are not and never will be who I am. There's no need to go into detail. I'm sure you know by now of the things that I've witnessed. I'm also sure that by now you know of the nights I have laid awake, the depression, anxiety, and other issues that have all been related to me never wanting to turn into my father or stepfather in the way that they treated my mom.

I watched them tear her to pieces and I watched silently as she struggled to maintain any kind of self-worth she could muster up. I watched the constant emotional and physical degradation that these two men who will remain unnamed imposed on her. I have been looking for answers as to why and how a man could treat his partner this way for my entire life and found that there is no answer. The only thing I can do at this point is make this promise to you to give you my entire being and heart, mind, and soul, in return for nothing other than your partnership.

I hear a lot of bullshit (excuse my language but this is about the best word I can use to describe it) from men who abuse their partners. They say things like they only do it because that's what they grew up around and the only thing they know.

Bullshit is probably the nicest word I can use in this piece to describe how I actually feel on that matter.

I never want you to have any kind of doubt in me as a man and in my character that I would be capable of doing those things to you.

If I have learned anything from growing up watching men that didn't respect or cherish their partner, it is how to be the man and father that you can respect because of the way I will respect and honor you.

I don't need a caretaker. I don't need somebody to stay home and take care of things. You are your own person and you can do whatever it is that you choose and whatever it is that will make you happy. I will cook, I will clean, I will take care of our kids (God willing), I will handle finances, I will do whatever I can to be a good partner to you.

I am writing this promise to you tonight not asking you for anything in return. I've learned a lot from these two men on what kind of a person not to be. One of the things I have learned is to do things for the sake of doing them, not for getting something in return. All I ask is that you one hundred percent trust me and accept that I am not now, nor will I ever be the men that I have witnessed.

This is my promise to you, my future wife. All I ask is that you accept me for who I am. Accept my incredibly loud and dysfunctional family, accept my flaws and shortcomings, take my hand, and make me the happiest man on the entire planet.

It is now, always has been, and always will be you.

So as I said before, take my hand, and walk with me. I can't promise many things, especially now that I have no clue who you are yet. However, I can assure you that when I do find you, or figure out that you've been here all along, I will spend my entire life doing nothing but trying to make you happy.

My arm is out, my palm is open, trust me, and take my hand.