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A Syrian Timeline As Told By Seinfeld Characters

Part 1 of the Syrian War timeline, as told by the funniest legacies on television, Jerry, Elaine, George, Frank and Kramer.

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A Syrian Timeline As Told By Seinfeld Characters

There's been a lot going down in Syria, a country that used be rich in culture, art, tourism, and natural beauty. However, there's always been innuendos of a future uprising due to it's thick police state, barely allowing citizens to whisper out against the government. Once a group of Syrians spoke out against the dictatorship, 470,000 civilians have been killed, 12 million have fled to seek humanitarian assistance, and Kramer from Seinfeld will get into more details.

Since there is just SO much going on in Syria, and has had so much going on for the past four years, this is part 1 of the war timeline, from March 2011 to March 2013. Stay tuned for next week's part 2 of the timeline, March 2013 to present!

March 2011: 15 Syrian students are arrested for spray painting "the people want the downfall of the regime" across buildings. People begin to protest the arrest of the boys, arguing for free speech and demanding the release of the boys and President Assad's resignation. The protests started in the south of Syria, Daraa, spreading all over Syria, especially to the capital city, Damascus. Security forces respond in violence, killing dozens of peaceful protesters. It had been 48 years, and the Syrians were finally voicing their opinions about the government.

April 2011: All of a sudden, President Assad labels the peaceful protesters as terrorists, giving security forces more authority to kill anyone involved in the protests. In just a month, hundreds of innocent people are killed. It gets so bad, France and the US interfere telling President Assad to make changes abiding to the protesters before there's more bloodshed. Assad releases some political prisoners. Wow, really makes up for the hundreds killed in just a month!

This month marks the first wave of refugees to escape Syria. People saw no hope, so they made a run for it. Just like us and Kramer during rush hour on the subway, except for the Syrians it was to refugee camps in Turkey.


August 2011: Assad is downright losing it, basically what the UK, US, European Union and other superpower nations conclude. They tell Assad he needs to step down before the situation goes more out of hand than it already has. He's taken city governors out of power, taken control of all cities, deployed troops in light of peaceful demonstrations, killed thousands, and led for thousands of Syrians to escape their homes. Basically, every international organization and nation on the globe is against Assad and his actions, and he's driving the country his way with an evil laugh on the side. Aka, screw you all.


October 2011: The UN Security Council introduces a resolution disapproving of Assad's actions, however Russia and China veto the resolution. Hmm, definitely a foreshadow.


March 2012: It's been exactly a year since the revolution began, and six international embassies are closed in Syria and more than 7,500 people have been killed. Oh, and the UN is still trying to create a resolution but nothing's changed, Russia and China wouldn't budge. Why would they continuously veto a resolution that could potentially save millions of lives and end the worsening bloodshed in Syria, you ask? Couldn't tell you!


May 2012: In the village of Houla, 50 children and 50 adults were killed, and a suicide attack a Damascus police base killed another 50 people. These events lead to multiple Syrian diplomats to be expelled from European countries. A slight effort is made to change; Assad holds parliamentary elections except most seats go to Assad and his allies. In other words, back to where we started. A loophole of total control.

June 2012: Hope is temporarily lost when the UN hits pause on it's Syria mission. Sorry, last time I checked, we can't really hit pause on helping out the thousands losing their lives to a tyrant in power. However, the UN does, their reasoning being the situation has gone out of their control. Isn't this exactly why the UN was created? To stop conflicts and bloodshed like this, especially now before they get worse? Additionally, Syria shoots down a Turkish jet plane near it's border, calling for an emergency NATO meeting. You can imagine the tension this creates between the two countries.

July 2012: The UNSC introduces resolution threatening sanctions against the Syrian government, again. Russia and China veto it, AGAIN.


January 2013: Happy New Year! Assad introduces a new and advanced type of firework to celebrate, it's called a bomb! Aleppo and Damascus are continuously bombed, at the same time Assad announces he'll create political reforms to end war.

February 2013: Happy New Year to you too, Assad! Love, the rebels and the car bomb outside your headquarters. The bomb, planted by rebels, kills dozens, thanks to foreign aid importing weapons. At this point, we can clearly say it's war as both sides are officially capable and fighting back. BTW, most of the world is #TeamRebel, and a few are #TeamAssad, but in most cases, they're being paid to be #TeamAssad. Confused? So is Kramer and the rest of the world. The media paints the rebels as the bad guys, but also history shows the atrocity began at Assad's authority. He started it, he condemns the killings of his people, and he is the most stubborn man on the PLANET when it comes to preventing more bloodshed by stepping down.

March 2013: The UN has a headcount of more than 1 million Syrians as refugees. Syrian planes bomb Raqqa, a city north of Damascus. The Al-Nusra, a Sunni Islamist militia fighting against the Syrian government and apparently tied to Al-Qaeda and their intentions, makes an organized effort to institute Islamic law in rebel-held areas. SO MUCH GOING ON IN ONE COUNTRY.

I think that may be all we can handle for this week.

Make sure to check back for the second part of the timeline next week!


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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