“There is magic in long-distance friendships. They let you relate to other human beings in a way that goes beyond being physically together and is often more profound.”- Diana Cortes.
Maintaining a friendship can be difficult. Especially when you don’t even live in the same state. With school, work, and other obstacles life can throw at you, it may seem impossible to keep a strong connection with a friend that lives miles away. It isn’t impossible though. With the right attitude and time management, there are many ways to make a long distance friendship work. My best friend Cassie moved to Arizona to attend Arizona State University, and I attend Missouri Baptist University. We’ve worked together to bring these tips for any other friends going through separation anxiety. It doesn’t matter what age or state you and your friend live in, below are some universal tips to make long distance friendships workout.
1. Make FaceTime and Phone Call a priority at least once a week.
Texting can be time consuming, and it’s hard to pile
everything into a text that you need to say. Even if it’s for 5 minutes, set a
side a time once a week to have a nice Facetime or Phone call, so the
communication can be clear. It will be nicer to hear the persons voice or
see them, even if it’s through a screen.
2. Constantly reminisce on old memories.
It will be harder to make new memories while being separated from your friend, so reliving your old memories will keep your friendship strong. Nostalgia can be painful, but thinking of the past can make you excited for the new memories you will create.
3. Talk to their family members.
It may seem over zealous that you are connecting with their family members at first. If you were close to their family before one of you moved, then sadly that means you are away from more than just one friend. Schedules get so busy that your friend may not tell you everything that’s happening. Stay connected with their family too so you can stay up to date with everything in your friend's new life.
4. Respect their time and schedule.
Along with moving brings a whole new schedule and period of adjustment. Give them personal space and time to relax and settle in to their new life. Not seeing them everyday will be a shock to both of you, but you must understand that constant communication just wont happen anymore.
5. Understand that it’s okay to make new friends.
It may seem like you’re replacing your friend or even being replaced when you start interacting with new people. It’s very healthy to be able to create new friendships and it can fill the void of missing your friend that has moved. Be sure to communicate to your friend that your feelings haven’t changed, it’s just time to let new people into your lives! It’s unhealthy to not allow new friendships to bloom just because a previous one is changing.
6. Plan a trip!
Trips can be expensive, but making time to go visit your friend is essential. There’s nothing like seeing them in person after a long period of time. It’s almost like nothing has changed since the move, even though a lot has. It’s also an excuse to travel and see new parts of the country, or the world. Most importantly, it’s a chance to create new memories that will last a forever.
Missouri Baptist University Freshman Jessie Shaver shared her experience with long distance friendships. "Stay in contact with your friend, but realize they probably will move on and make new friends just as you should. It made me stronger because I realize who true friends are. They will be the ones that haven't seen you for years but still check up on you and I think that is very important and valuable."
