Life can be cruel. It can be simple or complex, awe-inspiring and dolesome, fascinating and boring, all in a matter of twenty-four hours. We each have our own intricacies, our own form, thoughts, opinions, strengths, and weaknesses.

Here are 642 words on why I suck at life, and why that's okay.

As a human being, my body requires sleep. Unfortunately for me, I suffer from insomnia, so it can take an hour to fall asleep. Unfortunately for me, I suffer from depression and hypothyroidism, causing me to need more sleep than most people. Unfortunately for me, I am a college student with almost twenty credit hours on my hands, so I usually get half as much sleep as I should. So, I suck at waking up to my alarms in the morning, and I suck at judging when to leave my house in order to maximise my time in bed but also be on time to class.

Unlike most of the kids in my freshman seminar, I am not a procrastinator. That is one of my strengths, however, I plan ahead (I have a chart on my wall that states what classes I take exactly when and where up through my fifth year.) I plan ahead too much, stressing myself out over details that will change at least five times by the date of my graduation.

I suck at meeting people. One of the drawbacks of going to the same small school from kindergarten through twelfth grade. I suck at making small talk. I hate eye contact. I don't know what to do with my hands. So when it comes to meeting new people, I instead shy away and sulk in my loneliness on campus. Or resort to eating lunch with my mother four days in a row.

I'm clumsy. Like, can't-stand-up and trips-over-flat-surface clumsy. Gets-hand-shut-in-car-door clumsy. I've twisted my ankles so many times my doctor doubts that all the tendons are still attached properly. Which impacts my ability to exercise (that is, if my willpower or interest ever gets me to the gym in the first place.)

I have acne and I can't help but poke and prod. Plus I wear glasses (which I argue makes me look much better). I used to have braces. I have a soft stomach. Ugly Betty would be jealous.

When it comes to my friends, I love hard and long. Often times, my love of my friends outlives the relationship. Communication fails me, texts are confusing and intimidating, calls awkward and stressful, letters expensive and outdated. I remember being best friends with the blonde in kindergarten, the brunette in middle school, the bleach blonde freshman year, the short girl sophomore year and on. Still now I love all of my friends, present and past. I still wear the ribbon Kara tied around my wrist when she graduated, three years ahead of me.

I have my weaknesses, and I will be the first to admit them. I am a human, incapable of unbiased thoughts, incapable of fair assessment. I am growing and learning, teaching myself new things, making new friends (slowly, albeit,) and letting myself grow. It is okay to be human, it is okay to be weak. Growing, improving our natural abilities is the only true show of strength we, as humans, can manage. Admitting your weaknesses is the first step to strength, as soon as you stop stressing yourself out over those weaknesses you will blossom, allowing your sincere colours to shine.