We live in an era where it is considered poetic to be depressed. My anxiety has become a label that people put in their Twitter and Instagram bios for fashion. To anyone else, maybe I am a damsel in distress that needs to be saved. Maybe that is the beauty of it, because people love to say, "I saved her. She would have killed herself if it weren't for me."
Tell me why. What is beautiful about sobbing on the floor at three in the morning because your depression doesn't sleep? Why is it artistic to take pictures of your cuts and post them on Tumblr? What is romantic about about feeling so numb and empty that you'll hurt yourself just to feel something?
I think I speak for most people when I say that, of course, those that suffer from mental illnesses just want to live our lives and be happy every day. We don't want to have the voices in our heads, we don't want to live with anxiety, or depression, or OCD. We don't want to cry ourselves to sleep and we don't want to be socially inept. Nobody wants that.
No, I don't think it is trendy to have anxiety. I don't like to see you wear your t-shirts mocking my OCD. Maybe I am the only one, but I would be surprised if I was.
I hear so many people say, "I'd love someone who was depressed."
Of course you think that. You think that until you stand there before your loved one when they're in their darkest moments. Dark moments aren't having a bad day because your boss yelled at you. I think that's what people expect when they hear "I'm depressed." They think they'll come over and hug you and you'll be all better, until they realize that sometimes it takes a little more than a hug.
Don't get me wrong. There are many people who handle their depression and their loved one's depression very well. However, there's also a difference between expressing your illness and romanticizing something you don't know anything about.
It isn't beautiful to lay awake at night staring at the ceiling and get up the next morning with a fake smile on your face. It isn't romantic to kiss my scars and tell me I'm still beautiful.
I won't stand for it anymore. It isn't trendy to have anxiety. It isn't cool to be depressed.