There's this phrase that I have been hearing a lot recently and it has gotten me to think about a couple of things. I am twenty-three years old and I haven't had a boyfriend in five years.

*cue gasps from general public*

It seems time and time again I am getting asked if I have met that special someone yet. The question of "Do you have a boyfriend yet?" or "Have you met a special guy yet?" seems to take priority over how I am doing as a person. When I go to gatherings of any sort it is sometimes discouraging that I sit between my two brothers who are both in relationships. However, the idea that I need to be with someone at this age continues to annoy me and take a toll on me as a person. The thought of being with someone right now sounds amazing however it is not a necessity.

I am about to finish my bachelor's degree. My success and my education are coming first. My health, whether it be physical or mental needs to be better cared for. I'll be the first to admit I have let that slide in order to pursue a relationship. I want to be able to take care of my business and myself before I try to pursue a relationship when the pursuing continues to fail me. The hardest part of the failures is when I am asked what I did wrong to make these potential relationships go wrong. How is it that someone else's errors are my own fault?

We currently live in an age where love is one of the most important things that we NEED in our lives. However, there is a huge difference between a want and a need. I want to be happy with a man who values and respects me for who I am. I do not need a relationship in order to be validated as a woman. We seem to think that being with someone is the key to happiness.

However, being with someone can often lead to accepting mediocrity and unhappiness if we settle for less than what we deserve. It is time to stop accepting below average relationships and it is time to wait for a man who will be your support system and respect you for who you are. However in the process of waiting, do not make that the forefront of your priorities, let it be something that isn't of the most importance. Let that special thing come to you.

It's like saying goes,"Good things come to those who wait."