There is nothing more condescending and dismissive than someone telling you, "just love yourself." I get that. And I'm not going to sit here and write about how easy it is to do, because it's not. Instead I'm going to offer an alternate approach. Start owning your body.
It's sort of like a "fake it till you make it" mentality, but what I'm asking is that you start acknowledging your body for what it is, rather than what it is not, and most likely never will be. For instance, if I were to reach down and grab hold of my stomach, fat would collect in my hand. That is the simple truth, but that reality is not something to hide from. Because that skin and fat also protects my vital organs. And, it is the result of every incredibly delicious meal i've indulged in, and probably used as content for my food instagram. I'm not ashamed of those statements, why would I be ashamed of their affect on my body?
If there is a facial feature you tend to hide from, ask yourself how it got there. A bump in your nose might replicate that of your grandfather, or favorite aunt. It connects you to those who came before you, allowing you to show their history as it intertwines with your own. And acknowledging these truths will allow those aspects of yourself to move from the unbearable part of your mind, to a space that is more comforting, and even accepting.
There is no perfect path to positive self body image, but there is also no way to fast track the journey. My advice - start small. If you can't find something positive to say about your body, say something neutral instead. It's okay to take a minute to think about it. It is also okay to do this more than once a day if you need to. And finally, if you have a day where you wake up thinking you're the hottest person on the planet, you have every right to feel that way! Own it, cherish it, keep it as long as you can.
Your body is yours. It belongs to no one else. But at the end of the day, it's the only home you'll have forever. So honor your body for what it is: a home. And maybe one day you'll learn to love it too.
