You can't comprehend what it's like to have social anxiety unless you have it. Period.
You may think you have a grasp on it but trust me, you have no idea. Living with social anxiety is living in nearly constant fear.
Having social anxiety is the constant feeling of balancing backward in a chair--are you going to land safely or fall?
Having social anxiety is rehearsing for situations and conversations days in advance--but what if it doesn't go exactly as planned?
Having social anxiety is making friends with the cat at the house you're in--it's easier than being with a group of people you don't know, right?
You're nervous even around people you know. You can't control how you feel. You can't control the crazy part of you that thinks any time someone near you laughs it's at your expense.
Pushing yourself to just ask the cashier where the cucumbers are is terrifying, but then again, so is everything else.
Just living life is stressful enough, not to mention some situations stress you out to the point of crying in public, which only makes your anxiety worse.
You then dwell on the situation and how you may have messed it up; heck, this happens with memories from middle school that make you cringe.
To top it off, people around you without social anxiety don't understand how you feel so you feel judged and wrong. You're constantly told: "just do it," "it'll be fun," "you'll be fine," "what's your problem?" But what if you're not fine?
If someone unscrewed your head, all they'd hear is constant screaming.
So what do you do? You can push yourself to sit next to a stranger in German class so you have a partner or you can sit by yourself and sweat during class introductions.
Therapists say: "well, you need to talk to people." Okay, but do you know how much I can't do that? Going to a party of mostly strangers is equivalent to a person afraid of heights jumping out of a plane.
You feel overwhelmed so instead of doing anything you just do nothing and then continuously panic about it. Asking for help is out of the question because FEAR.
Conquering this fear isn't an easy feat to accomplish. Is it even possible, or do you fear public panic attacks and crying until your deathbed?
All you can do is set goals for yourself. Today, give a stranger a compliment and make your appointment by phone. Next weekend, hold your boyfriend's hand, tell him you're scared, and hang out with him and his friends anyway.
Make sure you have a comfort object whether it be your phone or a worry stone. You may not get over your social anxiety but with practice, it gets a little better.
