We hear it all the time: "I'm single but super ready to mingle!" Especially in college, girls seem to find it super necessary to be in a relationship and show off their picture-perfect boyfriend. I, on the other hand, have different plans. I live more by the phrase: "College is the time to find your bridesmaids, not your husband."
Being a young adult is really the only time in your entire life that you get to focus completely on yourself. As a child, you had limited understanding of the world around you, and your parents and guardians had near total control.
As an adult, you will likely be married, have children, and soon be completely responsible for their entire lives. As a teenager and young adult, on the other hand, is the time when the entirety of your attention can be on the development of yourself and the progression of your character.
When we are in a relationship, we are often so preoccupied with the needs of our significant other, that we forget to take our own needs into consideration. We focus on their desires, and spend so much time pleasing them, that we forget how to take care of ourselves.
Even in high school, I never took time to seek out a relationship. Sure, I had my moments, and yes, I, of course, have experienced "my first crush" moment. And I have always said that when the time is right, or when the right person comes along, I will, of course, be all over the opportunity.
However, I do not understand the necessity to be in a relationship that you know deep down is not for you and will not last, just for the sake of showing off your boyfriend to the world.
Society even encourages the need for women to still rely on men. As early as high school, we are encouraged to take dates to dances and are pushed to be interested in relationships. For Homecoming and Junior Prom, I did take dates. I had wonderful experiences and was lucky enough to have close guy-friends who did not make it awkward, but rather a very special night for us both.
However, my senior year prom, I decided to go to the dance with my very best friend, and I have no regrets. I was in no relationship, and the two of us had been best friends for nearly 10 years. What better way to celebrate our senior year together than make a lifetime memory of prom, rather than spend the night worried about the random boy we were coerced into attending a cliche dance with?
I'm not saying that relationships are not a wonderful experience. I have had my own personal experiences, and have truly appreciated it for what it has become. However, I do feel that we as women need to learn how to be independent, care for ourselves, and wait until the time is just right.