A Short Guide To Self-Love
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

A Short Guide To Self-Love

Learning to love Yourself is not an easy task.

62
A Short Guide To Self-Love
Dr. Debrah

More often than not we try to focus too much on making other people feel loved and cared for and sometimes we over look making sure we are taking care of ourselves. Self-acceptance is not easy and it will not happen over night. There will good days and there will be bad days. Self-love is a large subject to talk about, but I have narrowed it down to some of the most common things people might feel at one time or another. I am not a therapist or doctor. Most of these topics come from my own personal experience that I want to share what has helped me and some things I have learned from talking to my friends.


1. Learn to love yourself before loving someone else.

A common saying is that you can't find love in someone else until you learn to love yourself. This may be an overused saying for years and years, but it is because it still holds true. If you love and accept yourself as a whole, then you will not need to find love and acceptance from another person. You have the strength and independence to survive on your own when you love yourself. If we were to find happiness within ourselves and not require someone else's approval about ourselves, we wouldn't need that kind of reinforcement.

2. Focus on being alone and taking care of yourself.

For a while, I thought I needed a boyfriend or a friend to give me the approval that I am worthy of love and that I am good enough. I'll be honest – I've never had a boyfriend and at times learning to love myself was hard. It helped me grow though, being on my own. I learned things about myself I wouldn't have ever before if I was in a relationship. I have made strong friendships and those as well sometimes helped me grow and learn about myself. Sometimes I liked to be on my own, though. I grew then too, it gave me time to reflect on me. It's okay to reflect on yourself and think, "Hey, I did a really good job on my speech that I was nervous for!" or treating yourself to a day to take care of yourself.

3. Accept your faults and love your strengths.

Seeking happiness and love within ourselves is not easy. Loving ourselves is the hardest thing we will do. You are human, which means you naturally have faults. It is 100% okay to have faults. To love ourselves fully is to love our faults, as well as our strengths. It's easy to look at another person and not see things they feel negatively towards themselves. It's easy to see all the positives in them. Why wouldn't you do the same for yourself?

4. Reduce your stress and build you self-confidence!

On the bad days where we don't feel confident in yourself, you need to find ways to make yourself less anxious about your appearance. When I'm having a difficult day I do things that I enjoy. I read a few pages in a book I'm reading at the time, listen to my favorite bands, talk to a friend, drink tea, draw, and go for a walk surrounded by mostly nature and photograph what I see. It's important to be mindful of the things you enjoy to help reduce your stress.

5. Appreciate beautiful, peaceful things in life.

I hope these radiant flowers bring some color into your day as much as they did while I was photographing nature (while evidently being anxious). It's helped me a lot though, so go out and find what you enjoy!

6. Listen to your body.

When you stop comparing yourself to others, you will also find that your body is there and it takes care of you. It helps you survive even when you aren't taking care of it. Your body also will send signals to let you know when something is wrong. Listen to them and respect your body. Some things don't happen because you caused them. You cannot control your genetics, but you can do everything you can to help yourself. Your body can be repaired if you allow it the time. Your body loves you and your faults. If you make a mistake, forgive yourself, and move on.


7. Do good things for people.

I love to do good things for other people. It brings me warmth when I show someone I care for them. Not only does happiness become shown on the outside, but it can be felt on the inside. An inner feeling no one else knows unless you share. It's personal and connected to you. You may feel giddy and the feeling in your chest might become light. This is a good feeling, even if it feels different.

8. Allow yourself to feel everything.

Embrace your feelings. Allow yourself to feel. Cry if you need to. Laugh, be angry, feel regret, emptiness, happy, and scared. Allow them to pass as well, don't hold on for too long. Don't get stuck in a rut.

9. Give yourself a break.

It is also okay to take a day to give yourself a break. Even if it requires canceling plans or setting boundaries with people. Give yourself the space you need.


I still don't love myself completely and other days are rough. I'm struggling with depression and anxiety, which are things you should love about yourself too. Your faults are just as important as your strengths. Self love I believe is a life long journey. Life is always changing, we are always changing and not everything is constant. To sum up the guide in a shorter way, these are some tips to follow regarding self-love: Stop comparing yourself to others, learn to love your faults, let go of negative feelings (but allow yourself to feel), forgive yourself, and find things that you enjoy or that please you.


Please leave a comment below discussing things you do on difficult days and what you enjoy to make you happy. Share about your past experiences you've gone through and any tips you have! Thank you for reading! You are brave, you are strong, and you are tough. You will get through this.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

51560
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

33101
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

956081
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

181011
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments