Selfie-Steem: What I Learned After Two Weeks Without Selfies

Selfie-Steem: What I Learned After Two Weeks Without Selfies

What I learned after two weeks of not taking or posting selfies.

Sites like Instagram, Twitter, WhatsApp, and Facebook offer endless opportunities to not only connect with friends and family but also post as many pictures as your phone can hold. This article claims that more than 93 million selfies are taken every day, and about 14 percent of those selfies are edited.

As many as 34 percent of men, as opposed to 13 percent of women, say they retouch every selfie. But why are selfies becoming so important? Let's take a look at it from a social standpoint. There's a social psychology term "looking-glass self" that describes a sentiment in which who we are comes from how others see us as opposed to who we actually are.

Via Pinterest

Due to the increase in efficiency when it comes to taking and uploading selfies, the ability for others to see and judge us also increases. With most of these sites having a system of likes, favorites, retweets, and shares, outsiders' opinions of ourselves is becoming more and more important. Everyday Sociology hypothesizes that the entire process of a selfie—posing, editing, uploading, and hashtagging—is not so much for ourselves but instead is a social act. Since selfies are not posted in a private sphere, the act couldn't possibly be just for ourselves. Even the most humble of selfie-takers gain something from the act, even if it is just a small amount of self-confidence.

Via More Media Likes

This form of self-identity can be an extreme ego boost for some but can be devastating for others. But is a selfie really that important? I always thought of myself as someone who didn't particularly care about how many likes my pictures received, so in order to prove the importance of selfies and self-esteem (or selfie-steem) wrong, I decided to go two weeks without posting any pictures of myself or even taking any. Here are some things I learned.

1. I rely on likes and comments more than I realized.

The first few days I actually felt really self-conscious and, quite frankly, ugly. I didn't have strangers and acquaintances complimenting my looks (even though I edit all of my pictures to make sure I look perfect), and I wasn't getting that constant ego boost from watching the number of likes go up.

2. After getting used to the situation, my self-esteem got better.

After the first week of self-deprecating and low confidence, things started to turn around. Without having to stare at my overly edited face, unnaturally white teeth, or my overly made-up face, I actually started to feel pretty. And for once, that sentiment wasn't based on how many likes on Instagram I was getting, or how many of my friends commented on Facebook. It was based solely on how I felt when I looked in the mirror.

3. Selfies still matter to me.

Even though I started to feel extremely confident in myself without the constant confirmation from others, I still wanted the attention and support that I used to receive. Literally the very next day, I posted a selfie and then later deleted it because it wasn't doing very well in the likes department, and then later reposted an edited version to see if that did the trick.



Note that there's essentially no difference here. I used a filter to make me look more tan, but that's it! So why did I think it would make that much more of a difference? To me, the unedited picture looks better, but to others, the edited one goes over better. Apparently, even with the knowledge that I am more confident in myself without the constant approval of friends and strangers alike, I still desperately crave a solid online presence.

While some argue that it's fake or deceptive to edit pictures or wear too much makeup or even pose in selfies, the fact of the matter is, no matter what you do in your picture, it is still you. As long as you're comfortable with what you're putting out there for the world to see, who cares? You are you, and even if you like to be liked—or you like your selfies to be liked—it ultimately doesn't matter what others think. Post what you want, and be comfortable with you. If you want to show off a selfie that you feel the best in, use #selfiesteem in your picture to join the millions of others proudly showing off their faces!

Cover Image Credit: TechnoFAQ

Popular Right Now

8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.

Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.

7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

An Incurable Disease Doesn't Change The Love I Have For You

Because one day the one you love the most is fine and the next day they're not, it causes devastation you never truly recover from.


Loving someone with an incurable disease is the most emotionally straining thing I have ever experienced.

My significant other and I have been together for almost six years. During the summer of 2018, we all noticed the significant changes he was going through. He had lost around fifty pounds and had a lack of appetite. We had figured something was going on, however, we didn't realize it was anything serious.

Fast forward to the Fall semester of 2018. I had visited my boyfriend and we had expressed certain concerns, such as, through the night I would try and get him to stop uncontrollably itching his legs to the point of bleeding, or that he was looking a little yellow and was exhausted all the time. After seeing his sister in November, while I was at school, she pleaded with him to go to urgent care because he did not look good. He was yellow, exhausted, and very sickly looking. We didn't realize that the urgent care visit would be the precedent of the rest of our lives.

After coming home for Thanksgiving and spending a week straight in the hospital with him, it finally set in that something was not right. Between all the vomit, getting moved for testing, the weakness, the constant calling for medications because the pain was so severe, and the almost month-long stay in the hospital, it hit me full force that something was really wrong. Words will never truly describe the emotions I was feeling, or the burden of my thoughts that I felt were too selfish to pass on anyone, so I kept them to myself.

When we finally got the diagnosis, we were surprised. PSC, otherwise known as Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, is an incurable liver disease that affects the bile ducts which become scarred and inflamed, more likely than not lead to cirrhosis and an inevitable transplant. There was no cure, rather the only solution was a liver transplant, and even then the disease can be recurring.

I was thinking selfishly. I was torn in two. What would our future look like? Could we have children? Could we ever do the things we used to?

Loving someone with an incurable disease is a mix of emotions. There is a constant fear in the back of my mind that he is going to wake up in intense pain and have to be rushed to the hospital. There is a constant fear of every time waiting for the bi-weekly blood test results to come back, in fear that his Bilirubin spiked again or he is undergoing a flare up and needs to be hospitalized. There is a constant anxiety that one day he's going to be fine, and the next day he won't be. Even the simple things, such as laying beside one another, was a constant fear I had, due to the pain he was in every day. What if I hit him in my sleep on accident? What if I accidentally hugged a little too tightly and caused him pain?

Loving someone with an incurable disease can be a fluctuation of emotions, however, he makes it worth it.


Related Content

Facebook Comments