Have you ever been in a situation where you really liked someone, but they didn't like you back? Maybe you dated a couple times and you really wanted it to go somewhere, however, they didn't. Or, maybe, you really liked the person but they had no interest in making time to ever hang out with you.
I've been there more times than I'd like to admit, and I'm sure you have as well. We've all dealt with this at some point or another. Quite frankly, this situation really just sucks.
We get to a place where we want to be with a certain person and we give them all the love and compassion that we have. We lay our cards all the table by trying to make this person the center of the universe. By trying to show them just how much we care. We try to prove why they should be with us... but this person just doesn't want to be with us.
Now that I am seeing through a different lens, I somewhat understand, and honestly, don't blame them.
Let's be real— if you think about the last time you truly liked someone that didn't have those mutual feelings, maybe you dated for a bit and they decided to end it because they "just weren't feeling it" or they were "too busy" etc. There are a few questions you need to ask yourself when you like someone and there are no feelings of reciprocity.
How did you act around them? Were you confident? Were you comfortable? Were you trying to act like someone rather than yourself? Or, were you feeling nervous, insecure and unworthy?
More often than not, when we're attracted to someone that doesn't like us in return it's because we are stuck in a stage of feeling insecure, needy, and unworthy. We feel like we aren't good enough and we are nervous about getting rejected.
Let me be clear: it's nothing we need to beat ourselves up about. It is completely normal. Of course, we are going to be nervous when we're around those that we like, especially because getting rejected by them is a fear that haunts us.
However, if we find ourselves constantly in the place where we feel as if we need someone to validate our worth, then it's a clear indication that you need to do some soul-searching.
You should never need someone to boost your confidence. You should know what you bring to the table, and if you don't, eat alone until you do.