Before you do anything, learn to respect yourself. Don’t wallow in your self-pity and cry for your mistakes. Own up to things you regret or mistakes that you made and move on from there. You’ll never fix the problem unless you learn to first identify that yeah, you screwed up.
But after that, go easy on yourself. On top of realizing something or someONE that you regret, there are going to be lots of heavy emotions packed in there too. The worst thing you can do to yourself is hold onto personal blame for too long, and all that will do is let the emotions grow and keep you from moving on what you want to get past. Holding on to stressful emotions is always bad but in this case, the only thing it accomplishes is adding more to the idea and making whatever it is a heavier burden to carry.
So scrap that. Do your thing and say you screwed up, but don’t beat yourself up too much. If it helps, lie to yourself. Chances are you are the only one still thinking about it so why not talk yourself down from the whole thing to make yourself feel better and downgrade some of the mistakes. Obviously don’t go too easy on yourself. If you really know you screwed up then getting over it will not be a two-step process. Really be honest with yourself about what happened, why it happened, and who was really impacted because of it.
With that being said, find a way to face your demons and not sweep them under the rug, only to have them creep up on you again later. Instead just recognize what exactly you did, maybe why you did it, and whether or not you are going to let it happen again. If you want to go back and fix something, good, congratulations. I hope with all my heart that your strength to return to the crime scene works out for you in the end.
When you’re able yourself to stop thinking about your regrets and let them get inside your head, that’s when you’ve done everything you can for yourself. If the people still linger or repercussions keep coming after you, that is a different story. You are no longer fighting yourself but the things around you. The good news for that is that you now have your entire self on your side this time. If you know where your mind is and you’re happy with it, then no external source should be able to bring you back down from that point. The petty mistakes and regretful decisions will be faintly present but never again as strong or anything you haven’t already handled.
And as the cliché goes, time WILL heal wounds. For many of us, we’re at the age of taking risks, trying new things, and getting out of our comfort zone. Mistakes and regrets are inevitable. All you can do is learn from them, move on, and hang out until the next day comes along. A single night, a single person or a single decision will not stick with you for the rest of your life. Don’t let it. Everyone around you has very similar things they carry or will inevitably do in the future. So sit back, take it slow, and keep your head up because the only aspect that makes it a regret, is your decision to go back and look at it that way.
