Throughout my entire life, my name has always been pronounced wrong. No one could ever say it right and I am utterly convinced that people didn't even try and say it right. But, I am here for a public service announcement for every person who has ever had their name said and spelled wrong. Who has ever had their name spelled and said wrong and the other party didn't give a shit about saying it or spelling it wrong. Thanks, but no thanks. This one is for you.
Stop: (to the people who are pronouncing it wrong)!
If you cannot say it right, then please don't sit there for a good five minutes trying to pronounce it while looking at me awkwardly. You are waiting for me to say my own name - I know how to pronounce my own name - I am waiting for you to ask me how to say it like a real human being. Don't pronounce it wrong and then proceed to say "is that right?" Because you and I both know you damn sure are not right by the look on my face. And by the look on yours, you were trying entirely too hard to pronounce a name that requires zero effort.
Also, don't give them a nickname simply because you cannot say their name right. I am sorry you don't want to ask them how to say it, so you assume you call them another name they did not approve of...
But, if you cannot remember their name and then decide to pick a nickname, then no. If they say "Yes, you can call me a shorter version," that is totally different.
BUT, if you assume you can call me "Reca," then you cannot call me "Reca." But, nice try anyway.
Do not assume you can disrespect someone's name because you are too proud to ask them how to say it. Do not assume you can call them something that they did not approve of, because you don't want to simply ask them how to say it. Don't say their name wrong and then proceed to ask them how to say it. Do not pretend it is cute that you say their name wrong, it is not. They do not find you attractive because you disrespected them by saying their name wrong. Just don't.
Names are important and one of my favorite humans on this earth (who is a poet) said it better than anyone can:
“Give your daughters difficult names.
Give your daughters names that command the full use of tongue.
My name makes you want to tell me the truth.
My name doesn’t allow me to trust anyone that cannot pronounce it right.”
- Warsan Shire.
Always remember, do not trust someone who does not pronounce your name right. Your name is perfectly perfect for Y O U, and someone who doesn't want to learn how to say it does not appreciate you. Do not let someone disregard your name for something they perceive as a better fit. Your name is you, your experiences, your life, your hardships, you. It makes you and no one else.
So always keep that name. Always appreciate that name. Grow from those moments you remember when you were in middle school and hated your name and allowed people to mispronounce it and misspell it. Grow from those moments. Because just like you, things grow and that was one of the many misadventures of life.
Name appreciation for life - don't let anyone disrespect you or your name!
