During spirit week of sophomore year, my friends and I dressed up as Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. I was the Happy Dwarf, and this is an identity that I’ve carried on. I love embodying this role, whether it be in person or online through my weekly quote posts (shout out to Sweet Sentiment Saturdays). My identity as someone who is happy is nothing new: growing up, my mom called me Smiley, and still occasionally does. I’ve learned that in life, it’s much easier to feel good than bad.
Still, when talking about being labeled happy, there is an important distinction to be made. Of course, I love being considered happy, who doesn’t?
But more important than happiness, I am realizing, is positivity.
I think people often see positivity and happiness as the same thing. If we’re positive and always looking on the bright side, we must naturally be happy too, right? This is not the case.
One of my favorite aspects of positivity is that it allows us to feel as we are. Positivity does not force us to get rid of all other emotions, but gives us space to pause and reflect on our current state.
While happiness may come and go as our life experiences cause us to feel different things, positivity is something that can always remain with us.
Take transitioning to college for example. Personally, I had some days where I felt lost, scared, and lonely. Still, in those times, I had this infinite hope, and even stronger than that, faith and knowledge, that things would get better. And they did. I still felt those negative feelings, but even while feeling them, I kept positivity in the forefront of my mind.
Yes, happiness is what we are constantly striving for as human beings, and I would love to be able to say that I feel happy all the time. Yet this rejects all the other emotions we encounter and feel in our life- anger, sadness, betrayal, anxiety- many of which, upon accepting and then overcoming them, will ultimately lead us to feeling stronger, and in turn, happy.
We often put too much pressure on ourselves to be happy, and in the process, disable ourselves from that even being a possibility.
Focusing on happiness and thinking “I feel so sad, if only I felt happy” is dangerous. Not only does it make us feel hopeless and at a loss for what to do, but it rejects the feeling of sadness, not allowing us to process it so we can move forward.
If we instead focus on putting our best foot forward each day and staying committed to our well being, then we embody positivity. Delving deeper into that, positivity means seeing the infinite potential in all situations, recognizing that you are doing the best you can, and things will work out for you in the end.
Positivity is the ability to stay hopeful while feeling hopeless.
Something for me that has been crucial to maintaining an attitude of positivity is the incorporation of quotes and affirmations in my daily life. As I am writing this, I am staring at a sign that says “She believed she could, so she did.” (For those of you who know me, you're aware of my obsession with this quote, which may be covered in a future article). Having something material in front of me as a reminder to strive for goodness makes all the difference.
It is okay to feel lost, depressed, frustrated. It is okay to have bad days.
Maintaining an attitude of positivity is crucial to aligning with who we are and becoming our best selves.
Because that’s what we all really want, right?
To end with a quote, “Always believe something wonderful is about to happen.” Because it is!
Sending good vibes,
Sam
