Perfect Relationships Do Exist

Perfect Relationships Do Exist

And You Can Have Them Too!
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First I must say that the most important relationship you will ever have is the one with yourself. So investing your time and energy into getting to know yourself and delving deep within a self-examining journey is key to creating great relationships.

I have been told that I am very good at giving relationship advice and many people are shocked to know how many close personal relationships I have (I have a large group of friends from all walks of life and age groups). So people ask me how do I do it? How can I keep track of every one?

My answer is simple: Connect first and foremost and come from a place of Fairness, Love, Balance, Respect and ultimately from a “treat other people the way you want to be treated”. When you come from those spaces, not only do you connect on a deeper level with the person, but you also create authenticity, honesty and clarity as well and you don’t have to “keep track” of anyone. Great relationships will just naturally come into your life with grace and purpose.

The secret to having deep and meaningful relationships is to have at the base of your relationship a foundation of self-expression and being heard. Without these, fear will rule any relationship. One of our basic innate needs as human beings is the need to be heard. We might not agree on things, but just as long as someone heard us, we feel good. This will apply to your romantic relationships and your business relationships as well, as when you are respectful, thoughtful, clear, authentic and just all around transparent, you will build long lasting and fruitful relationships with people.

Through the years I have learned to discern those who will treat me the way I expect to be treated and those who won’t. This discernment must be exercised and practiced in order to create the best relationship. Just because someone is in front of you does not mean you must enter into a relationship with them. I had to weave through and examine my past non working relationships, whether they were romantic, friendships, business related or just momentary, in order for me to figure out how to surround myself with the relationships I wanted: deep, non-judgmental, self-expressed, loving, open and caring.


Here are 3 tips for having “perfect” relationships across the board:

1. Principles:

Be very clear on your principles from which you operate and use them every time you make a decision. If you have to list them, do so. Make a list and then prioritize the top 3-5 most important principles. Mine are: Love, Compassion, Authenticity, Inspiration and Beauty.

2. Ideal Relationships:

Once you are clear on your top 3-5 principles, make a list of the types of relationships you want to have. Divide your relationships into 4 categories: Romantic, Family, Friends and Business. List the qualities of the people you want to be in relationship with in each category and then watch for those people as they come into your space. If you are one of those people who does not get along with a lot of people I suggest you look inside and see what unresolved issues these relationships might be triggering and write a list of those things along with the qualities of those relationship that you don’t want and then burn it (the list) to release it and get them out of your system.

3. Making a Shift:

Notice the people you are now meeting and check them with your principles and relationship list. You will notice a nice shift from what has been previously in your life. Continue to be aware of your principles and relationship types so that more of those you want come into your life. If you are not seeing a change, there is more inner work you must do before a shift can be made, so go back to 1 and start over. Or seek support from a coach, mentor or grounded friend, so you can create the perfect relationship with anyone!

Deep relationships are amazing and strong relationships are necessary to live a fulfilled life. Everyone you meet can fit into a relationship area and can be held to your standard of that area. You are in charge! You decide what kind of a relationship to have with the people in your life. Some you will keep closer and others at arms length, loving all where they are at including yourself! Just remember to do the 3 steps and you too can have the perfect relationship with anyone!


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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.

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To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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10 Quotes That Will Help You Realize Your Self-Worth

Sometimes you need a little pick me up and that's okay because I'm pretty sure it happens to everyone. When I need a pick me up, I tend to look over quotes that help with either giving me an ego boost or reminding me to keep working.

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These 10 quotes are from a notes page that I keep on my phone with a list of over 100 quotes. I keep quotes on my phone to give me reminders, advice, or even some motivation. I specifically chose these ten quotes to help anyone remind themselves to never give up and to know your self-worth, which is priceless.

1. "Hold yourself to a higher standard than anyone else expects of you. Never excuse yourself."

This quote reminds me to only focus on what I think about myself and to continue bettering myself. The part of the quote that states, "never excuse yourself" really illuminates how there is always room for improvement in every aspect of your life. Never allow yourself to fall behind and to continue growing.

2. "I am left with no choice, but to create an empire from these ruins within me."

Anyone I am depressed (or heartbroken...), this quote reminds me you can only come up from rock bottom.

3. "If you're happy in yourself, you radiate happiness and attract happiness."

Any time I'm feeling down, I like to read this quote because it helps me work to getter better. The quote pushes me to get better because everything is much better and warmer when you're happy. Emotions soak in more, laughs are genuine, and happy tears become a reality.

4. "You don't need to be better than anyone else, you just need to be better than you used to be." -Wayne W. Dyer

Dyer's quote forces me to continue improving myself. I know this is similar to the first quote, but it helps even more because it reminds me to never forget where I came from.

5. "Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn't worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens." -Louise L. Hay

When I am feeling down about myself, Hay's quote helps me get out of the funk because I will only continue to spiral if I only focus on the negative.

6. "I am the flower and the thorns. I don't need you to touch me in order to blossom." -Haley Hendrick

Hendrick's quote gives me the confidence to be a strong independent young woman. I do not need a pity party to feel better about myself. I can cope and continue growing because rain is the only way flowers bloom.

7. "Be nice to yourself. It's hard to be happy when someone is being mean to you all the time."

If you continue to criticize yourself and only focus on your "flaws," you will never be able to be happy. I know it is harsh but if you don't love yourself, you won't be able to ever fully love anyone. Being kind and allowing yourself to grow is the best self-care. Take a break from whatever you're busy with at the time if you need to. Take a breath and focus on the reasons you love yourself and what all you have accomplished.

8. "I wanna make my parents proud, my enemies jealous, and myself satisfies."

This quote points you in the direction of self-growth because it allows you to remember there are never excuses for yourself. Growing up is a part of life, so is adaptation and evolution. You have to go with the flow and keep up with the times.

9. "Your body is not a temple..."

"Your body is not a temple. Temples can be destroyed and desecrated. Your body is a forest, thick canopies of maple trees and sweet wildflowers sprouting in the underwood. You will grow back, over and over, no matter how badly you are devastated."

Do not ever let anything keep your down, break through the ceiling if you have to. Keep pushing and working for whatever dreams you have.

10. "You don't have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life..."

"You don't ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life. It doesn't matter whether someone is s relative, romantic interest, employer, childhood friend, or a new acquaintance — you don't have to make room for people who cause you pain or make you feel small. It's one thing if a person owns up to their behavior and makes an effort to change. But if a person disregards your feelings, ignored your boundaries, and "continues" to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go." — Daniell Koepke

Sometimes, you had to leave behind people you thought would be in your life forever because they're holding you back. Sometimes they just always bring negativity and make you feel bad about yourself. Sometimes people make cool jokes and don't understand how it isn't funny. These people are toxic and it is okay to remove them from your life. Keep growing but always remember what could have happened if you stayed behind.

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