"Why do you write?" After being asked this question so often, I find myself not being able to answer it. I've been trying to explain to people that I write to express my emotions in a healthy way. Using writing as a coping mechanism. It's no secret that I'm a mess right now (especially if you've been reading my other posts recently, I promise they won't all be so sad/upsetting). Writing how I feel and think about my current situation, my past, my trauma, people I have relationships with, etc. helps me rationalize all my thoughts and helps me process everything going on. Which has been really nice since I feel like I'm losing my mind all the freaking time lately. It helps me figure out what I really want to say to people, cope a little bit better, and understand myself more in a way. 

I write for empathy. I want someone, even if it's just one person, to know that they're not the only one that feels so bad at times. It's so hard to get through anxiety, depression, an addiction, or whatever is making you feel so awful, by yourself. To feel like no one experiences the emotions you harbor inside. To feel like no one just quite, gets it the same way. To think that, you're left alone in your own f**ked up world. Its hard. I find comfort in empathy, so I'm sure other people do too.   

I write to speak my mind. I have been known as the loud mouth girl, and that's who everyone in my small hometown knows me as. I love to talk. I'll gabber on and on if you let me. Writing gives me a way to say whatever I want, without being in someone's face about it. If you don't care to know what I have to say, then cool. (But if you are reading this and my other posts, you must care for some small reason ? ) 

I write to tell people how I feel. I often write entries or letters that are meant for specific people, but usually they never read it. And it's okay because, they don't always need to know how you feel. I think it can be unwise to let someone see all your cards, so to speak. I think this idea is wonderful; it helps me get everything in my head straightened out. And I don't think its a bad thing to let 'em wonder a little sometimes.   

Its comforting to me knowing that I have no way to tell who views my posts, but that people do read them. So, I thank you for that. Writing isn't about getting tons of views or shares or whatever. Writing, to me, is about just feeling okay. Everyone knows I'm a mess anyway. Might as well make it interesting while I try and heal a bit.