Everyday I wake up and go through the same rituals. I jump out of bed and watch the sun rise and marvel at the horizon as it caresses the sky. After awhile, my daily methods and routines begin to normalize and I have the surreal sensation that progress in my life is meaningless. As the days go by like seconds, and the years accumulate. I ask myself one very important question,"Why am I here? Why do I exist?" I look at my achievements and my milestones with mild satisfaction and repressed anger. I try to realize my utmost maximal potential everyday in whatever form this may manifest itself, but my wanders around endlessly with an almost animalistic anger. Every night I look up at the stars and wonder if my life will ever have a purpose....
In the future, I hope I can find meaning in my life and that all of my eco and my present day feelings can be in line. I know without a doubt that everything that happens in our lives are part of a plan that we were never meant to understand. I'll never know why things are the way they are until life is nearly at its end. Ever since this stark realization, I've began to think more of a future oriented type of mindset. One day I'll be on my death bed and i'll be reminiscing on the life I have lived and the stories I could tell. To me life isnt all about what you achieve, but the journey you take to get where you want to be. Life shouldn't be all black and white, but it should be filled with laughable memories with the people that matter the most.
Personally, I want to live a joyful life, not just a happy life. In my definition, happiness is an emotion that is experienced in the heat of the moment and can be easily taken away. On the other hand, Joy is an emotion that is steady and is a sign that life is going well. Its like being on cloud nine constantly despite living in a uncertain world. The only time in my life that I've felt pure joy was growing up and training for wrestling. I was so passionate for the sport and despite the ups and downs I knew that there is 1,440 minutes in a day, but only 6 of them really mattered to me.
In conclusion, I will continue to work very hard in my daily life to go where I want to be. Maybe enough time hasn't elapsed in order to find myself and realize that all of my worries were never needed to begin with. To anyone reading this, stay humble, work hard, do your job, and seek the truth. Because with most issues in life the truth will set you free....
