Dear Teacher,

In all my 19 years and endless hours of school I have had what I believe to be some of the greatest most inspiring teachers/ professors I have ever come across. You, however, are not one. You were the teacher who constantly put me down and did not show me mercy. You took out your frustrations with other students on me. I was not a hard enough worker, a quick enough learner, or a good enough student. You never openly or publicly displayed this, but your actions and other orders spoke much louder than any words you spoke towards me. Actually, the fact that you did not speak to me because you were “unhappy” with my behavior spoke much louder. This isn’t about me finally after many years airing out my frustrations. No, this is about me and that I have finally proved to myself all the things you insisted I was not.

You, not entirely sure why or if it was purposely, made me feel as if I was not enough and that success was an inconceivable idea. I will live with the look of disapproval you felt I deserved and it will always haunt my decisions, even when I write things such as this. You, in a twisted manner, ruined friendships and drove me out of the one place I had a right to feel comfortable, school. I look back and I applaud you because I learned so much more about life, from my transfer into public school. I was challenged on a higher academic level, believe it or not. I finally fit in. Oh, and I had teachers that lead me towards my dreams and even my major. They supported me and fought for my success in every aspect of life, not just my education.

I hold no resentment and while it took me a long time to get to this point I am thankful. I am thankful that you didn’t care because it made me care so much more. I sit here, now two and-a-half semesters into my college career, proud of my grades and my progress as an undergrad. I have goals to make dean’s list and to strive for all A’s, but honestly I will be okay if I don’t reach these set goals. I will be okay because I know that I tried. I tried for myself, not for you. Not for any other teacher who actually impacted my life in a good way. Not for my parents, who have cheered me on even through the toughest of times, but for me. Thank you for teaching me, indirectly of course, that I am the only person who can create my own happiness and success. I have learned from you ironically enough that it is better to consistently strive for success and not have someone's approval than to have all of the approval in the world, but zero motivation to reach that goal you have set.

Teacher, I know that the way I feel towards you will never change. It just pains me too much to think about speaking with you ever, luckily I will never have to. I hope you however have learned through the past years. Learned to be more tentative and supporting. I will believe that maybe you were just in a bad place. I do this in good faith… I hope for your sake because I have been on the other side and I know how the student who was “not good enough" feels. While this pushed me, drove me, and made me passionately seek success not ever student will respond in the same manner. I cannot imagine how differently my life would be if I were that student.

One last time I Thank You, I put to rest my frustrations and my anxiety towards you. I place a side my experiences to move on to bigger and much better things my higher education has to offer me. In closing I want you to know, that I am much better off because of all the things you failed to do as a teacher.

Best,

The student you couldn't put down